Two Peevys in a pod!

Another chapter...

2012-01-17T16:31:00.000-08:00

I started this blog after college as a way to keep up with friends and see their cute kids. It has become a journal of the different chapters of my life such as my move to Georgia, my marriage to Brandon, my journey through infertility/miscarriages and such. In recent months it has become more of a journal/help tool for those going through adoption. It is with you in mind that I am careful the way that I write this entry.

I have been writing this blog post for a while now and trying to find the right words. Although there is some thought behind this post I doubt I will be able to convey the true emotions that this chapter brings.

Back in October, Brandon and I decided to expand our family through adoption. We began to research and start the mounds of paper work that adoption involves. We made it to our first interview and had a great meeting with a phenomenal agency.

Two days later I began to get sick, felt super tired and just felt like something was wrong. Sure enough, after taking a pregnancy test, Brandon and I found out that I was pregnant. (Catch that Jennifer?)

Although we were excited, fear began to creep in and I just felt like it was the beginning of another end. Day after day things continued to go well and though there have been some scared and bumps in the road, it looks like the baby is doing well.

We are currently 15 weeks and have seen the baby during a few ultrasounds to make sure everything continues to be ok.

Brandon and I decided to go through with our home study to have it on file but have not gone past that stage. Our home study stays good for a year. We are still planning on adopting but felt like this pregnancy needed my full attention at the time.

We still have a heart for adoption and still believe it will be a part of our future.

I know this is hard for some people to read who have followed this blog because of their similar paths to ours. Please know that I am still well aware of your struggles and pray that your heartache comes to and end soon.

Please continue to keep us and the baby in your prayers. We are hopeful that in July we will be holding our sweet baby. We can't wait to add another Peevy to our pod.

How to help a family that is adopting

2011-11-03T07:49:00.001-07:00

Stole this from an adoption blog I follow...so true! By the way...we probably won't have an "airport" experience like she talks about...but we will have a long car ride :)

Supporting Families Before the Airport

Your friends are adopting. They’re in the middle of dossiers and home studies, and most of them are somewhere in the middle of Waiting Purgatory. Please let me explain something about WP: It sucks in every way. Oh sure, we try to make it sound better than it feels by using phrases like “We’re trusting in God’s plan” and “God is refining me” and “Sovereignty trumps my feelings” and crazy bidness like that. But we are crying and aching and getting angry and going bonkers when you’re not watching. It’s hard. It hurts. It feels like an eternity even though you can see that it is not. It is harder for us to see that, because many of us have pictures on our refrigerators of these beautiful darlings stuck in an orphanage somewhere while we’re bogged down in bureaucracy and delays.

How can you help? By not saying or doing these things:

1. “God’s timing is perfect!” (Could also insert: “This is all God’s plan!” “God is in charge!”) As exactly true as this may be, when you say it to a waiting parent, we want to scratch your eyebrows off and make you eat them with a spoon. Any trite answer that minimizes the struggle is as welcomed as a sack of dirty diapers. You are voicing something we probably already believe while not acknowledging that we are hurting and that somewhere a child is going to bed without a mother again. Please never say this again. Thank you.

2. “Are you going to have your own kids?” (Also in this category: “You’ll probably get pregnant the minute your adoption clears!” “Since this is so hard, why don’t you just try to have your own kids?” “Well, at least you have your own kids.”) The subtle message here is: You can always have legitimate biological kids if this thing tanks. It places adoption in the Back-up Plan Category, where it does not belong for us. When we flew to Ethiopia with our first travel group from our agency, out of 8 couples, we were the only parents with biological kids. The other 7 couples chose adoption first. Several of them were on birth control. Adoption counts as real parenting, and if you believe stuff Jesus said, it might even be closer to the heart of God than regular old procreation. (Not to mention the couples that grieved through infertility already. So when you say, “Are you going to have your own kids?” to a woman who tried for eight years, then don’t be surprised if she pulls your beating heart out like Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.)

3. For those of you in Christian community, it is extremely frustrating to hear: “Don’t give up on God!” or “Don’t lose faith!” It implies that we are one nanosecond away from tossing our entire belief system in the compost pile because we are acting sad or discouraged. It’s condescending and misses the crux of our emotions. I can assure you, at no point in our story did we think about kicking Jesus to the curb, but we still get to cry tears and feel our feelings, folks. Jesus did. And I’m pretty sure he went to heaven when he died.

4. We’re happy to field your questions about becoming a transracial family or adopting a child of another race, but please don’t use this moment to trot out your bigotry. (Cluelessness is a different thing, and we try to shrug that off. Like when someone asked about our Ethiopian kids, “Will they be black?” Aw, sweet little dum-dum.) The most hurtful thing we heard during our wait was from a black pastor who said, “Whatever you do, don’t change their last name to Hatmaker, because they are NOT Hatmakers. They’ll never be Hatmakers. They are African.” What the??? I wonder if he’d launch the same grenade if we adopted white kids from Russia? If you’d like to know what we’re learning about raising children of another race or ask respectful, legitimate questions, by all means, do so. We care about this and take it seriously, and we realize we will traverse racial landmines with our family. You don’t need to point out that we are adopting black kids and we are, in fact, white. We’ve actually already thought of that.

5. Saying nothing is the opposite bad. I realize with blogs like this one, you can get skittish on how to talk to a crazed adopting Mama without getting under her paper-thin skin or inadvertently offending her. I get it. (We try hard not to act so hypersensitive. Just imagine that we are paper-pregnant with similar hormones surging through our bodies making us cry at Subaru commercials just like the 7-month preggo sitting next to us. And look at all this weight we’ve gained. See?) But acting like we’re not adopting or struggling or waiting or hoping or grieving is not helpful either. If I was pregnant with a baby in my belly, and no one ever asked how I was feeling or how much longer or is his nursery ready or can we plan a shower, I would have to audition new friend candidates immediately.

Here’s what we would love to hear Before the Airport:

1. Just kind, normal words of encouragement. Not the kind that assume we are one breath away from atheism. Not the kind that attempt to minimize the difficulties and tidy it all up with catchphrases. We don’t actually need for you to fix our wait. We just want you to be our friend and acknowledge that the process is hard and you care about us while we’re hurting. That is GOLD. I was once having lunch with my friend Lynde when AWAA called with more bad news about Ben’s case, and I laid my head down on the table in the middle of Galaxy Café and bawled. Having no idea what to do with such a hot mess, she just cried with me. Thank you for being perfect that day, Lynde.

2. Your questions are welcomed! We don’t mind telling you about the court system in Ethiopia or the in-country requirements in Nicaragua or the rules of the foster system. We’re glad to talk about adoption, and we’re thankful you care. I assure you we didn’t enter adoption lightly, so sharing details of this HUGE PIECE OF OUR LIVES is cathartic. Plus, we want you to know more because we’re all secretly hoping you’ll adopt later. (This is not true.) (Yes it is.)

3. When you say you’re praying for us and our waiting children, and you actually really are, not only does that soothe our troubled souls, but according to Scripture, it activates the heavens. So pray on, dear friends. Pray on. That is always the right thing to say. And please actually do it. We need people to stand in the gap for us when we are too tired and discouraged to keep praying the same words another day.

4. If you can, please become telepathic to determine which days we want to talk about adoption and which days we’d rather you just show up on our doorstep with fresh figs from the Farmer’s Market (thanks, Katie) or kidnap us away in the middle of the day to go see Bridesmaids. Sometimes we need you to make us laugh and remember what it feels like to be carefree for a few hours. If you’re not sure which day we’re having, just pre-buy movie tickets and show up with the figs, and when we answer the door, hold them all up and ask, “Would you like to talk for an hour uninterrupted about waiting for a court date?” We’ll respond to whichever one fits.

Supporting Families After the Airport

You went to the airport. The baby came down the escalator to cheers and balloons. The long adoption journey is over and your friends are home with their new baby / toddler / twins / siblings / teenager. Everyone is happy. Maybe Fox News even came out and filmed the big moment and “your friend” babbled like an idiot and didn’t say one constructive word about adoption and also she looked really sweaty during her interview. (Really? That happened to me too. Weird.)

How can you help? By not saying or doing these things:

1. I mean this nicely, but don’t come over for awhile. Most of us are going to hole up in our homes with our little tribe and attempt to create a stable routine without a lot of moving parts. This is not because we hate you; it’s because we are trying to establish the concept of “home” with our newbies, and lots of strangers coming and going makes them super nervous and unsure, especially strangers who are talking crazy language to them and trying to touch their hair.

2. Please do not touch, hug, kiss, or use physical affection with our kids for a few months. We absolutely know your intentions are good, but attachment is super tricky with abandoned kids, and they have had many caregivers, so when multiple adults (including extended family) continue to touch and hold them in their new environment, they become confused about who to bond with. This actually delays healthy attachment egregiously. It also teaches them that any adult or stranger can touch them without their permission, and believe me, many adoptive families are working HARD to undo the damage already done by this position. Thank you so much for respecting these physical boundaries.

3. For the next few months, do not assume the transition is easy. For 95% of us, it so is not. And this isn’t because our family is dysfunctional or our kids are lemons, but because this phase is so very hard on everyone. I can’t tell you how difficult it was to constantly hear: “You must be so happy!” and “Is life just so awesome now that they’re here??” and “Your family seems just perfect now!” I wanted that to be true so deeply, but I had no idea how to tell you that our home was actually a Trauma Center. (I did this in a passive aggressive way by writing this blog, which was more like “An Open Letter to Everyone Who Knows Us and Keeps Asking Us How Happy We Are.”) Starting with the right posture with your friends – this is hard right now – will totally help you become a safe friend to confide in / break down in front of / draw strength from.

4. Do not act shocked if we tell you how hard the early stages are. Do not assume adoption was a mistake. Do not worry we have ruined our lives. Do not talk behind our backs about how terribly we’re doing and how you’re worried that we are suicidal. Do not ask thinly veiled questions implying that we are obviously doing something very, very wrong. Do not say things like, “I was so afraid it was going to be like this” or “Our other friends didn’t seem to have these issues at all.” Just let us struggle. Be our friends in the mess of it. We’ll get better.

5. If we’ve adopted older kids, please do not ask them if they “love America so much” or are “so happy to live in Texas.” It’s this simple: adoption is born from horrible loss. In an ideal world, there would be no adoption, because our children would be with their birth families, the way God intended. I’ll not win any points here, but I bristle when people say, “Our adopted child was chosen for us by God before the beginning of time.” No he wasn’t. He was destined for his birth family. God did not create these kids to belong to us. He didn’t decide that they should be born into poverty or disease or abandonment or abuse and despair aaaaaaaall so they could finally make it into our homes, where God intended them to be. No. We are a very distant Plan B. Children are meant for their birth families, same as my biological kids were meant for mine. Adoption is one possible answer to a very real tragedy… after it has already happened, not before as the impetus for abandonment. There is genuine grief and sorrow when your biological family is disrupted by death and poverty, and our kids have endured all this and more. So when you ask my 8-year-old if he is thrilled to be in Texas, please understand that he is not. He misses his country, his language, his food, his family. Our kids came to us in the throes of grief, as well they should. Please don’t make them smile and lie to you about how happy they are to be here.

6. Please do not disappear. If I thought the waiting stage was hard, it does not even hold the barest candle to what comes after the airport. Not. The. Barest. Candle. Never have I felt so isolated and petrified. Never have I been so overwhelmed and exhausted. We need you after the airport way more than we ever needed you before. I know you’re scared of us, what with our dirty hair and wild eyes and mystery children we’re keeping behind closed doors so they don’t freak out more than they already have, but please find ways to stick around. Call. Email. Check in. Post on our Facebook walls. Send us funny cards. Keep this behavior up for longer than six days.

Here’s what we would love to hear or experience After the Airport:

1. Cook for your friends. Put together a meal calendar and recruit every person who even remotely cares about them. We didn’t cook dinners for one solid month, and folks, that may have single handedly saved my sanity. There simply are not words to describe how exhausting and overwhelming those first few weeks are, not to mention the lovely jetlag everyone came home with. And if your friends adopted domestically right up the street, this is all still true, minus the jetlag.

2. If we have them, offer to take our biological kids for an adventure or sleepover. Please believe me: their lives just got WHACKED OUT, and they need a break, but their parents can’t give them one because they are 1.) cleaning up pee and poop all day, 2.) holding screaming children, 3.) spending all their time at doctors’ offices, and 4.) falling asleep in their clothes at 8:15pm. Plus, they are in lockdown mode with the recently adopted, trying to shield them from the trauma that is Walmart.

3. Thank you for getting excited with us over our little victories. I realize it sounds like a very small deal when we tell you our kindergartener is now staying in the same room as the dog, but if you could’ve seen the epic level of freakoutedness this dog caused her for three weeks, you would understand that this is really something. When you encourage us over our incremental progress, it helps. You remind us that we ARE moving forward and these little moments are worth celebrating. If we come to you spazzing out, please remind us where we were a month ago. Force us to acknowledge their gains. Be a cheerleader for the healing process.

4. Come over one night after our kids are asleep and sit with us on our porch. Let me tell you: we are all lonely in those early weeks. We are home, home, home, home, home. Good-bye, date nights. Good-bye, GNO’s. Good-bye, spontaneous anything. Good-bye, church. Good-bye, big public outings. Good-bye, community group. Good-bye, nightlife. So please bring some community to our doorstep. Bring friendship back into our lives. Bring adult conversation and laughter. And bring an expensive bottle of wine.

5. If the shoe fits, tell adopting families how their story is affecting yours. If God has moved in you over the course of our adoption, whether before the airport or after, if you’ve made a change or a decision, if somewhere deep inside a fire was lit, tell us, because it is spiritual water on dry souls. There is nothing more encouraging than finding out God is using our families for greater kingdom work, beautiful things we would never know or see. We gather the holy moments in our hands every day, praying for eyes to see God’s presence, his purposes realized in our story. When you put more holy moments in our hands to meditate on, we are drawn deeper into the Jesus who led us here.

Here’s one last thing: As you watch us struggle and celebrate and cry and flail, we also want you to know that adoption is beautiful, and a thousand times we’ve looked at each other and said, “What if we would’ve said no?” God invited us into something monumental and lovely, and we would’ve missed endless moments of glory had we walked away. We need you during these difficult months of waiting and transitioning, but we also hope you see that we serve a faithful God who heals and actually sets the lonely in families, just like He said He would. And even through the tears and tantrums (ours), we look at our children and marvel that God counted us worthy to raise them. We are humbled. We’ve been gifted with a very holy task, and when you help us rise to the occasion, you have an inheritance in their story; your name will be counted in their legacy.

Because that day you brought us pulled pork tacos was the exact day I needed to skip dinner prep and hold my son on the couch for an hour, talking about Africa and beginning to bind up his emotional wounds. When you kidnapped me for two hours and took me to breakfast, I was at the very, very, absolute end that morning, but I came home renewed, able to greet my children after school with fresh love and patience. When you loved on my big kids and offered them sanctuary for a night, you kept the family rhythm in sync at the end of a hard week.

Thank you for being the village. You are so important

Mix of Emotions

2011-11-01T18:03:00.000-07:00

All I can say is WOW!

I have no idea how to put into words all of my hopes, dreams and fears now that this process is officially underway.

We had our first home study meeting tonight. Melissa, our case worker, is super sweet and on our side for sure! :) She really likes us and that's a great thing.

We walked through our home study requirements and she was pretty impressed with all my organizational skills. Honestly so am I! I can't believe I have really kept up with all of this paper work. Brandon says when I want something I go until I get it. I guess this has been motivation to stay organized and do what I need to do.

As she began to talk about the possible heartaches that could happen through this process, a part of me wanted to stand up and scream, NO! No, there can't be any more heartache. Don't you know that I have been trying for 2 years, 3 if we are honest, to have a child and for 34 out of 36 times I have gotten my period and wondered why I am broken? Don't you know the other 2 times I lost my baby and experienced grief like I had never imagined was possible. There is no more room for heartache. None.

Truth is...there is more room for heartache. I have not been through what other women have been through. I have never given birth to a still born child. I have never miscarried beyond 6 weeks and for that I am so grateful. There's room I suppose.

My biggest fear throughout this process is that we will be matched and the mother will change her mind during the "dreaded days." The length of those days is different for each state. Florida is two days or as soon as the birth mother is released from the hospital. Georgia is TEN DAYS. 10 days folks. That's a LONG time. Not to mention if the birth father doesn't sign off and comes forward later he can screw with you until the finalization which can take up to 4 months. Ai yi yi.

The thought of finally having a child to love of my own makes me want to take this risk but honestly I am scared now. I am literally placing my future in the hands of the Lord and two birth parents who can have me on a string.

We still feel called to do this even after tonight but I am not going to lie...my heart feels like it is on the chopping block.

We will finish up the final few parts of our paper work this week. We still have the sanitation check, medical reports, Brandon's part of the profile, photographs of us and our house and our FBI clearance. We are going to go through a process that cost more money to get our FBI clearance back quicker. This is because a lot of the grant programs that we are applying for have to have a completed home study first. We are not trying to rush the process but we can only make a good choice of agencies once we know what kind of financial resources we have. We will mail what we have on Monday and then we will set up our individual interviews from there.

While I am organizing all the paper work, Brandon is becoming Mr. Do-it-yourself-Bob-Villa around here. He is getting ready to lay new floors in our nursery room and hallway and he is super excited. He's excited to learn how to do it. I am excited for him and will continue to support him from my computer and paper work on the couch. :)

I know that I am pouring out my heart on this blog these days but to be honest, it's my outlet because I imagine that everyone who reads it cares. It's also a journal to look back on through our journey as well as a sounding board or help to others going through this process. I can't wait to read this journey with a little one in my arms one day and smile at the incredible journey that we are privileged to experience.

Until next time...

Rockin and Rollin

2011-11-01T10:26:00.000-07:00

I am waiting to wake up from the dream that this home study process is acutally rocking and rolling right along. (I actually had a dream last night that someone handed me a check for 20,000...oh for that to come true :)!)

Today we found out that we don't have to pay for our 911 checks or septic tank inspection. That is HUGE since there are so many little things that will nickle and dime you to death when it comes to adoption.

We have just a few little things to fill out and the second wave will be done.

Today at 4:30 is our first meeting with our caseworker for our home study. It is our first of 4 meetings with her. We (I) am nervous. It's the first money that we have applied towards anything and that in itself is nerve racking.

I'll update tomorrow and let you know how the meeting went and what to expect next in this process!!

Until next time...

Open or Closed

2011-10-28T20:38:00.000-07:00

I knew there would be a lot of decisions that we would have to make in the process of adoption. Race? We don't care. Gender? Doesn't matter to us. International or Domestic? We've chosen domestic. All these choices have been made and honestly have come quite easily.

The hardest decision ever has been deciding whether or not to do open, semi-open or closed adoption. I try to pull from my own experience through some of these decisions but for this one, my experience is kinda jaded. I knew my birth mother and it wasn't a very pleasant experience. She's not really a nice person (ask Sara Beth) and I don't really like her to be honest with you. I have never met my birth dad but I am really ok with that too. Sure there are moments where I would love to see what he looks like now. Moments where I wonder where he has been all this time. What is his story? How much of his genes have played into my story? Ask how many other children he has donated sperm to but never acknowledged or wanted.

But now here's the decision staring me in the face. What if my baby has birth parents who are actually kind and good but just young and not ready to give this baby a life? What if my baby is in the tummy of a woman who is so desperate to keep her baby and love it like she has the other 5 that she has birthed but knows that she has no money or resources to do so? What if my child will have good people for parents? Can I watch my child bond with the woman that carried them and be ok with it? Can I really keep up with all the communication that is required with an open adoption? Can I really put my heart out there like that? Do I really want the birth parents to know everything about me?

But then again there is the side of closed adoption. When my baby lies awake at night with those doubts and questions, do I really have the right to choose a close adoption and not have those answers for my baby? Can I really keep them from their heritage just to keep my heart protected? It would be so much easier but God has obviously not chosen us for an easier path.

Semi-Open means that all communication will be through the agency. All pictures, all phone calls, all meetings, all letters, everything would be through the agency. It seems like a good choice but she might not be open to it.

Whatever the path, I pray that we make the right choice. The choice that will allow our baby to grow to be a healthy person both emotionally and physically. The choice that will put the pieces together for our child.

The First Wave

2011-10-25T10:49:00.000-07:00

My hope is that this blog can become a resource for other people hoping to adopt. I am going to try my best to keep it updated with the paper work as we submit it so that you know what our process looked like.

10-21-11 - Submitted Initial homestudy application
HIPA forms agreeing to criminal background checks

This first application was pretty easy and just asked generic questions. It was about 11 pages altogether.

The next wave is the HUGE wave. There we will submit all forms such as driver's licence, health insurance, car insurance, marriage certificates, pages regarding sleep positions to reduce the risk of SIDS, our 911 log, our septic tank check, our finicial statement, salary verification sheets from our employers, personal profiles (10 pages each, over 100 something detailed questions), medical forms, FBI background checks, Rabies vaccinations for both pets, 4 personal reference letters, and even an agreement to copy all documents twice. Whew!

The good news is we are almost finished with it should be ready to send it in within the next few days. From there we will begin the four interview stage followed by our written report.

Things are actually moving along great and we could not be more excited.

Until next time...

Reactions

2011-10-21T10:49:00.000-07:00

The reactions I love the most to the news that we are adopting are the ones that are just as excited for us had we told them we were pregnant.

We told Brandon's cousin Erin the other night and she ran to the press box during the middle of half time and told her husband who is a high school football coach. She interrupted his game to tell him. He was just as excited and wanted to know when we were going to pick the baby up. She had to explain to him that it was a long process and that we were just getting started. He couldn't understand why we just couldn't go pick the baby up.

The other sweet reaction has been Brandon's grandmother Mama Ruth. When we told her that we needed the rocky horse that Brandon's grandfather made for him years ago because we were adopting a baby she welled up with pride and became so excited for us.

We are so excited about this process and love seeing people who are willing to celebrate with us as well.

9 months

2011-10-20T18:56:00.000-07:00

When a person gets pregnant they are usually pregnant for at least 9 months. I think I have even heard somewhere that it averages out to 10 months by the time it is all said and done.

Going into this process we thought it would be a long, drawn out ordeal because of stories we have heard.

Well apparently all you have to do is tell an agency that you don't mind what race your baby is and birth mamas and agencies start coming after YOU!

Although adoption can be a wonderful thing; in some ways it has a way of making you jaded towards the world. I am not sure where some companies can justify a 20,000 dollar difference between a white child and a black child. 20,000 dollars. 20,000. I am not sure when adoption stops being adoption and starts being child trafficking.

To update you on our status, here's where we are:

We are have officially submitted the first part of our home study process. It's the initial application which is just a few pages of information and a few signed forms.

Next comes BIG DADDY! It's the 25 page application process that we BOTH have to fill out as individuals. Right now it is being stored in a 3" binder that I am lovingly referring to as my "adoption bible" or "BIG DADDY" cause this thing is HUGE! This is just the home study folks. We haven't even contracted with an agency yet.

We have already started gathering the 847,000 documents required for the home study including our 911 calls for every address we have ever lived in and our septic tank check. Yeah...you have to have both of those to be official. Once our applications are approved we will begin the interview process which includes 4 interviews. We will both do one individually, one together, and then one at our house where they will check it over. Before this happens we hope to have all the new floors laid down and the nursery at least started.

So far I can equate the adoption process to being butt naked in a see through box in the middle of the street where you can't see out but they can see in. Your entire life and all of your feelings, hopes, dreams, failures, flaws and imperfections are constantly being put on display for everyone to see.

I have also found the process to be healing. Adoption is something that forces you to get on your knees before God and depend on him like you never have before. It is a process that brings your and your spouse together because at times only you understanding what you are doing and why you are doing it. You feel alone but together if that makes any sense. It's a process that has made me deal with some inner demons that I have always felt towards my birth parents. I pray that at the end of this process I can look back and see the tremendous growth that I am sure I will experience.

It all seems a little surreal to me but I am ready for the ride.

Till next time...

3 Choice Kinda Girl

2011-10-13T10:48:00.000-07:00

I am a three choice kinda girl. Dinner? Give me three choices and I'll decide. Clothes? Give me a few choices and I'll pick something. Friday Night Date? Brandon knows to just give me three options and I'll pick one.

I really wish someone would just narrow down all the choices when it comes to picking who is eventually going to match me up with my child.

There are so many agencies and so many choices that my head is spinning. We have given ourselves until November 1st. We will make our final decision then.

And so it begins...

2011-10-12T08:24:00.000-07:00

A disclaimer.

***This blog will probably very obviously become only about our adoption process. Yes there will probably be the occasional education rant, random update of our life, pictures of events and friends, but right now our life is becoming consumed with the adoption process. At this point you have two options. 1. Keep reading. 2. Or don't. For years I have read about your cute little children and all their milestones so give this aching heart of mine a break and allow me to be in the "expectant" stages of recieving my child.***

So the paper trail begins and what a trail it is. Because we are more than likely going with an adoption agency that will be in the state of Virginia we will not only have to go through their paper process but also the agency here in Georgia that will be completing our home study. We have however found a great agency that does a independent home study for pretty cheap (I use that word very loosely.) Our first mount of paper work is coming in the mail this week and this is just the preliminary stuff from both agencies. I am excited to fill all of it out but scared at the same time that at some point someone will read our paper work and tell us there is no way they are going to place a baby with us.

Once the preliminary stuff is sent in and we are accepted into the different agencies we will then go through the home study process which will take a few months to complete.

Ai yi yi! This is going to be a roller coaster ride for sure but we are excited to strap in and take off.

Immeasurably More

2011-10-10T06:00:00.000-07:00

14 For this reason I kneel before the Father, 15 from whom every family[a] in heaven and on earth derives its name. 16 I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

I have always loved Ephesians 14-19, especially the part about being rooted and established in love. Oh how I long to be able to truly grasp just how wide and long, how high and deep the love of Christ is for me. As I kept reading this time, I found the diamond in the rough so to speak. The verse that I believe will carry us through this adoption process. The promise that Christ is ABLE to do IMMEASURABLY more than all that I can ever ask or imagine. So many times I only want what I think is best for my life and for my marriage and family. But what I want is so fickle and small compared to what Christ wants for my life and my family.

As we go through this adoption process Brandon and I are already starting to dream of what this process is going to look like and how it is going to unfold. Truth of the matter is...it probably won't look a thing like what we are expecting. It probably won't turn out just like we have planned it...but that's ok. Because I know in my heart that Christ is able to do IMMEASURABLY more than I can ever ask or imagine. I have to give myself over to the fact that in the end the timing will be perfect for our lives, the child will be the one that we are meant to love and raise, it will be immeasurably more than I can ever hope for or ask.

So as we start this journey, I ask that as you think about our family that you will stop and say this prayer for us.

I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Adoption is an Option

2011-10-05T17:55:00.000-07:00

I was adopted at the age of 9 months. My story is actually pretty crazy. Before I was 9 months old I had traveled in 2 stolen trucks and covered both the northern and southern parts of the country. The first stolen truck was when I was 2 weeks old. It had no windows and our destination was Wisconsin in October (points to the birth parents for smart thinking on that one!) The ~~smart ones~~ didn't stop there and a few months later I was in a stolen 18 wheeler this time (gotta make it better than the last) on my way to Tampa, Florida. In the words of SB...I win.

The FBI called my grandfather and his wife in the middle of the night to inform them they had custody of their granddaughter (that's me by the way) and were wanting to know if they wanted the cutest baby they had ever seen (Ok...so they really didn't say that last part but you can just imagine that I was!)

It's a girl!! Kay and Erskin were now the proud parents of a bouncing baby girl. Ok, so I wasn't bouncing. I was dying actually. 2 weeks of feeding me and bathing me and I was finally doing some better and not covered in grime and dirt. My actual adoption did not take place until years later thanks to the birth mother and sperm donor trying to come in and out of the picture. At 5 years old I was sitting on my dad's lap when the judge called the matter of Christine Leigh Simms into order. I distinctly remember asking daddy who that was and when were we going to McDonalds.

So, why all of a sudden am I telling you my adoption story? As my heart beats out of my chest I am so excited to announce to you that Brandon and I have decided to pursue adoption!!!! (let the cheering begin!!) It is something that I have always wanted to do. Brandon had never really thought about it because, honestly, it was never really on his radar of life. He came from great wbiological parents and always just assumed that after he married the perfect woman the perfect baby would come along. After he met the less than perfect woman and her less than perfect adopted family, he began to realize how much adoption played into my story and how cool it would be to welcome a child into our home that needed a forever mommy and daddy.

Honestly our fertility issues are probably pushing up our adoption timeline more than we would have ever imagined. However, knowing that it was a future plan for our family and knowing that adoption can be a lengthy process, we have decided to go ahead and start the process.

To answer the annoying and nosy-question-that-is-really-none-of-your business-but-I'll-deal-with-anyway...if we are to get pregnant through this adoption process we will still continue to seek adopting. Adoption is not simply something we are doing because we can not get pregnant...it is something we would have done anyway.

Our first major decision is international or domestic (the picture included should show you where I am leaning :)) We are on two different sides of the fence on this one and are seeking to come to an agreement. We are about 6 months out from submitting our paperwork. It will be a lengthy process that hopefully I will keep you updated on.

I pray that you will support us and that you will continue to pray for our family as we come to your mind. I look forward to the day that we get to introduce you to our son or daughter.

Love,

The Peevys

It's here...

2011-08-31T06:30:00.000-07:00

What's that you say? What could be here to cause such excitement in the Peevy household?

That's right my friends

That's right my friends. It's time for some football. Not just any type of football. College football. The kind that you turn on Game Day at 9 in the morning and leaving it running until 11 at night when it's all said and done!! I am so ready!! Roll Tide Roll!

Soul Stirring

2011-08-10T10:22:00.000-07:00

I love it when God plants a thought, scripture, phrase, song into my soul and just stirs it. The ones that you know can only be from from the Lord. The ones that stay with you and bring you unbelievable peace and joy. The one that calms you, settles you, makes you smile, or just plain sets you free.

The past few weeks I have been moaning, complaining, worrying, all of those things that I am not suppose to be doing about some of my current situations.

One of my friends simply shared this verse with me and it does all of those things that my soul is desperate for right now.

1But now thus says the LORD, he who created you, O Jacob,
he who formed you, O Israel:
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name, you are mine.
2 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you;
when you walk through fire you shall not be burned,
and the flame shall not consume you.
3For I am the LORD your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.

My heart is resting in this verse right now.

Trip to Savannah

2011-08-01T10:56:00.000-07:00

We decided the first year that we were married not to give each other gifts for our anniversary. Instead of gifts we try to take a trip every year. We don't always get to take the trip the weekend of our anniversary (that's what happens when you get married on the weekend of your annual family reunion.)

With Brandon working at the fire department we had to wait until he could swap some vacation time with other fire fighters. We didn't have many days this year so we decided on a quick trip to Savannah, Ga.

Savannah was amazing! No, we didn't eat at Paula Dean's because the line was ridiculous (did I mention we went in July??) to have your name put on a list for a time to come and eat. That was a little disappointing but the trip was still incredible.

Brandon and his priceline.com abilities (thanks Sara Beth) got us a great rate at the Hyatt. We ate at some amazing restaurants. I would highly recommend Vic's on river street. Amazing! The shrimp and grits were incredible.

I also got a little shopping in while we were there. My new addictions are bracelets and scarfs. I love them. I have a pretty basic black shirt and grey pants that I love to dress up with different pieces of jewelry and I love my scarfs. I got some cute stuff at a little shop on River street called Stuff under Twenty. Not really the most creative name but it caught my eye and I bought stuff so I guess it works.

This year I am teaching Georgia Studies and honestly I know nothing about it. We decided that the trolley ride through Savannah would be a great idea. Other than the 100 degree heat, it really was amazing. We got to go through all the sections and see all the important history of Savannah. We saw where the Girl Scouts were started. We got to see a lot of the famous ports and houses that were the beginning of Georgia as a colony. We also got to see where "Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil" was filmed and where Forrest himself sat on a bench and said the famous lines, "Mama always said life is like a box of chocolates. Never know whatcha gonna get." That was so fun!! :)

The trip really was amazing, short, but amazing. I am so glad that we decided to go and would love to go back when it is a whole lot cooler.

Yipeee!!

2011-07-30T06:50:00.000-07:00

I remember my first day of school pretty well for some reason. I had on a super cute dress, was sporting my freshly permed-chlorinated from the summer of swimming at the YMCA blonde hair, and I had my paisley notebook and school supplies ready to go! My house was not that far from school but my mom let me ride the bus anyway. The dawn had just broke across the sky when the bus showed up to get me for the first time and I was finally able to step on Mr. Scott's bus.

I still feel that excitement, now as a teacher, every year that we return to school. I am just like a kid when it comes to picking out my office/school supplies for the year. I make sure that my first day outfit is perfect and sets the tone for the year (yeah I know...I have come a long way in fashion from pink shorts!) (that's another blog soon on it's own.) I make sure that my classroom/office area is set up perfect with just the right amount of material on the walls but room enough to allow student work to be displayed. I love it.

Bigger than that excitement is the thought of a new group of students. The possibility that you might meet one of those students who changes your life forever. The chance that you might get that student that truly allows you to be a part of their transformation into young adults. They will transform you and stay with you a little bit but there's always that handful that leave their mark on you in a special way (hopefully not a creepy way that would make you the Fox5 News Headline story at 6:00.)

I am so excited for a new year. A year of partnering with other teachers as their co-teacher to help students with disabilities succeed in the regular classrooms. I am excited about a caseload full of students that I can help show their abilities and not just focus on their disabilities. A year full of learning a brand new school and becoming part of a new family of teachers. Pep rallies, football games, dress up weeks and plays.

So here's to a new year, a new start, a new excitement.

Forever God is Faithful

2011-07-22T08:29:00.000-07:00

When you have what you want or desire does God all of a sudden become faithful?

That question, phrased a little differently, was asked to me by my pastor after our second miscarriage. In other words, when you finally do have a child, is God all of a sudden going to become a good and faithful God to you?

My answer to him was something along the lines of.... Well Shit... why did you have to go and ask me that question. (Yes I cussed to my pastor. Yes he was ok with it. No I am not going to Hell and if I am you are going to be beside me for judging. Moving on!)

The more I have thought about that question the more that I am reminded that God is faithful in day to day things just as He is faithful in the big things. There are of course a few big things in life that Brandon and I are holding out hope for but there are so many things along the way that we have been blessed with that we can't complain about what it seems like we are missing.

I don't ever want to become the person (that I see on facebook...a lot) complaining about everything that is wrong (or like members of our family for that matter.) Sure sometimes you need to bitch and gripe but save that for your best friend (sorry SB for all the ranting) or for a date night with your girlfriends or better yet just put the big girl panties on and build a bridge.

God is faithful. I am healthy, I am taken care of emotionally and physically, I have a husband to share my life with, I have a job, I am not struggling with bills or whether I can put food on the table (hell I'm having to go to weight watchers because there has been to much food on the table.)

Bottom line: He is faithful and I am blessed.

Grief

2011-07-08T18:42:00.000-07:00

I know this probably isn't the post that you expected since I told you I would be back with one about my experience in Nicaragua. I have written that post a dozen times and never liked the way it felt. There was so much on my heart coming home from Nicaragua that it literally has taken me this long to figure out how to express it. But tonight as I thought about what our family is facing once again it all came to me.

Grief is a funny thing. Sometimes we grieve the loss of love ones that are precious to us. We grieve what we will miss about them, what we loved about them, everything that we hold dear.

Sometimes if a person dies that we have anger or issues with, we instead grieve what we never had in them. This was the case with my dad. I loved him but he wasn't always the greatest dad in the world. I think that left me to grieve the dad that I longed for him to be.

It wasn't until I graduated from Judson that I realized that we sometimes grieve the lost seasons in our lives. I still choke up thinking about being the last person to pullout of Judson the day that we graduated and hearing the "I try to say goodbye and I choke, try to walk away and I stumble," song. I grieve the lost conversations between friends, the appreciation for differences in opinions and beliefs, the sisterhood of dorm life.

Through every episode of grief in my life the stages of grief have followed me. Shock, denial, begging and then the rock bottom place of brokenness and tears.

So why did I have to come all the way to Nicaragua just to experience grief yet again? Unfortunately this episode started way before I ever left for Nicaragua. It actually started when Brandon was in Nicaragua in March on his mission trip and I found out that I was pregnant.

I never once thought that I would ever have trouble having children. My birth mother popped out 5 of us and left us to fend for ourselves. Since I am a responsible adult (most of the time), care about others, have the means to take care of a child, ya-dah-ya I just always assumed that I would be able to look at my husband and get pregnant. Instead, I have only been pregnant 2 times in the last 3 years and both of those times have resulted in miscarriages.

The last time we found out we were pregnant Brandon was in Nicaragua. I now know the exact spot he was sitting in when I Skyped him the news. Because we had had the previous miscarriage I never really allowed myself to believe that I was pregnant and stayed very cautious throughout the entire ordeal. When Brandon returned home, I started miscarrying.

I went through a few of the stages of grief. The shock in the doctor's office. The denial in the pastor's office. The begging at home in my bed pleading for God to just make it right. But instead of allowing myself to go through the remaining stages of grief I somewhere decided to shut it all down. Better to feel nothing at all than to feel the weight of that grief.

I sucked it up, charged on through, got through another end of the school year and boarded a plan to Nicaragua.

The trip was like any other mission trip. Lots of poor people, poor towns, work to be done. You grow attached the kids. We loved on them as hard as we could knowing that we would soon leave and rejoin our comforts of home. By Thursday I was ready to be home, to be cool, to be clean, to be in the arms of the one I love, so Friday was going to be a piece of cake when it came to leaving. Right? Wrong.

It was on the steps of an orphanage in Nicaragua that God chose to break me and usher me through the brokenness of the miscarriage. As I watched our group say goodbye to all the kids they had grown to love I began to weep. Somewhere in their goodbyes I found my goodbye for the child that we had lost. It's hard to lose something so small, something that never really was what it was intended to be.

I wept for the first time since the day we found out that we were miscarrying. It wasn't a loud, Oprah, ugly cry. It was a slow stream of hot tears accompanied by a painful feeling in my gut. But once the moment had passed, I realized I had done something that I had been afraid of doing all my life...I had said goodbye. I said goodbye to our child that day, along with the other faces and moments in life that I have needed to let go.

I never imagined that moment would come in a foreign country but I am so glad it did. I am so glad that I didn't check out on my emotions and become bitter with life. I am so glad that I went through that hard and painful moment because I know I can survive the pain. Does that mean that I want to go through grief ever again? No. I am no fool, I know it is a part of life. But this time I know that I am strong enough to handle whatever may come my way.

So there it is. Not the itinerary trip, picture slide show, you were probably expecting but somehow writing it has been healing and that's all that really matters.

Wrecked

2011-06-07T10:26:00.000-07:00

I think the best way I can describe myself after the trip to Nicaragua is wrecked. I have a lot to blog about the trip but I feel like it will come in bits and pieces as my heart and my head have time to completely flesh it all out. Right now I am afraid what I have to say won't make sense and I want to be able to fully capture what I experienced on the trip. So be on the look out for the a few post in the days/weeks to come.

In other news, Congratulations to one of my best friends Aundrea Orr Baisley. Aundrea and John choose not to know the sex of their baby and kept the name under wraps until a few hours after the birth. Last night, baby girl, Georgia Faye Baisley, made her grand debut. She was 8lbs and 7oz and is as cute as a button. I can't wait to get home to hold her and love on her.

That's all you get for now!

Reunited and it feels so good...

2011-05-23T07:52:00.000-07:00

I haven't really had time to process the reunion weekend with SB, Rita and Kim. Really the only reason why I am writing about it this quickly is because I am out to beat them at everything and had to pull the trigger and be the first to blog about it.

The girls got to my house around 6 on Friday. This was remarkable since they piddle-farted around as much as they could and left during rush hour traffic. When Rita got out of the car I knew she didn't want some sappy, long, tight hug so I gave a quick one and said something mean about them being late and to hurry up and get their crap in my car because I didn't trust her or SB's driving. It seemed to set the mood pretty well for the weekend.

And let's talk about what all they brought...I had one little duffel bag and a few books and a purse. Sara Beth did not fail to disappoint with her 3 pillows, comforter, 2 bags packed with fat dresses and other clothes for a two night stay in which with the exception of Saturday dinner she stayed in the same exact outfit with the same exact hairstyle, and a few other random collections. Rita had some TOTO basket, a few bags, a pillow and some other crap. Kim had a pillow, a few bags and some other crap to not be undone by the other two. This didn't count the fact that we still had to go to Wal-Mart and buy groceries. So I finally packed all their crap in the car and finally figured out a way to get the trunk to close. And let's just throw in the side note that I feel so uncool because I do not have a kindle and or knook and or IPAD to be addicted to like crack like these three ladies.

We were off to Wal Mart where I proceeded to tell Rita that I was disappointed that she wasn't 300 pounds and as large as a house. Rita has been talking about her weight like she has gained 500 pounds since Judson. I on the other hand have gained 300 pounds since we left Judson and it was disappointing that she was clearly not in my club. To me she looked just like she did when she left Judson...Tiny and Beautiful :)

It was clear from the car ride that we were going to need to pee a lot in order to not pee on ourselves from laughter. We cracked ourselves up in the first 30 minutes and some how made it through Wal-Mart. As we were trying to pack the groceries in the car we got some unexpected help from a nice black lady who told us where to put things.

We made the trip to the house and had a great weekend. We ate an ungodly amount of CRAP. Like we should all be in cardiac arrest. I have craved meat, vegetables and water all day today. That should tell you something.

We recapped the last 8 years of our lives, leaving out parts until someone called us out. I apparently missed Kim's and had to fill in the pieces as we go and I already knew Sara Beth's.

We talked about you. That's an ambiguous you because we pretty much talked about everyone. Just like you talk about us and we are OK with that.

We talked some about Judson but not as much as one would think. We did however relive a few good old memories that had us all cracking up at how fun our college years really were...or maybe not. :)

We stayed up late, some later than others, slept late, some later than others, and did nothing on Saturday except go to dinner where we completely showed our gluttonous side once again and had one of the most phenomenal waiters ever.

I am sure there is more of a retrospective/what I learned from the girls/ what I missed about the girls/ that may or may not ever be created and posted. It truly was a great weekend though. It was one that I will look back on in 30 years and smile thinking about that comment that was made or that memory that was shared.

Thank you girls for helping me find myself a little more and for helping me remember you.

Love you all!

I'm reading, I'm reading

2011-05-20T06:46:00.000-07:00

Over the past few weeks I have actually got the chance to start reading. Reading that has NOTHING to do with emotional behavior disorder, students with learning disabilities, or behavior charts. AMEN!

Instead I am reading:

If you are married you should read this book. The end.

My Judson friends have decided to start a little book club. I will technically start this book this weekend when Kim brings it to me.

Fusion: My pastor has recently asked me to take over the process of new members/visitors. It seems like it will be an easy read. I have already went through the first chapter making notes. I am excited about this new ministry and can't wait to get it all organized and put together (nerd alert!)

So yay for me for reading. I think that this might be my new challenge. To read a book for fun, a book to help me/us grow and a book to keep me engaged in either education or church leadership.

Pretty dang pumped! I am hoping for a lot of time to read between the plan ride to Nicaragua and the 3 hour bus ride once we get there. Ai yi yi!

Letters to Me Part 2

2011-05-20T06:44:00.000-07:00

My name is Taylor and I have brown hair, brown eyes, and I like to play sports like Football, Basketball , and I also like to play outside on my trampoline, and I love to hike and get dirty too. I like to act crazy to and I like to watch football and basketball.
Mrs. Peevy is nice and sometimes mean. She is the cheerleader coach and the track coach too. She teaches reading, math, and Science. Mrs. Peevy is married and she is a woman.
Good things to do in class are do your work. You need to sit right and don’t talk out loud. Don’t stand on the desk and don’t get on Mrs. Peevy’s nerves that is a good one. Finally, do what you are told.
Bad things to do in class are fight, getting on Mrs.Peevy’s nerves, talking when Mrs.Peevy is talking ,calling people names and throwing stuff in class. Don’t tear Mrs. Peevy’s books or you will pay for that book, don’t steel anything from Mrs. Peevy or you will pay for it, don’t be bad for Mrs.Peevy or be bad when she’s not there.
Make sure you’re nice to Mrs.Peevy or I will find you and I will hurt you.
Peace from Taylor Coleman

*** Another class had the students write a letter to their favorite teacher. A student who is not my favorite sometimes wrote his to me. I am a little too emotional to add it to the blog today. Maybe next week. ***

Letters to Me

2011-05-12T04:53:00.000-07:00

Every year I have my students write a letter to my upcoming class. Sometimes I actually use them and sometimes (more than not) I forget about them. Mainly the letters are a keepsake for me. They are sincere and usually pretty funny. So I thought I would share them with you and have them written one more place in case I ever lose them. :)

Dear Student,

My name is Spencer and I hate writing. I have a twin sister named Savannah. I also have a girlfriend named Savannah. I also hate Science.

Mrs. Peevy is the coolest teacher ever. She is so cool I feel asleep one time and she did not give me a detention. She loves dogs and poetry. She is also married.

A good thing to do in class is listen because it is funny. You should also sit in your seat. You should also help in class. You should always be nice.

You should never talk about her mom. Never talk rude to her. Do not argue with her because you will not win. Do not stick out your tounge to her.

So always be nice. Never be mean to her. Be respectful to her and most importantly be good.

Spencer.

I'll post a few more in a few days!

I say Good-bye you say Hello

2011-05-10T10:35:00.001-07:00

Wow. Only 8 more days of school remaining. That means there are only 17 more days until I leave for Nicaragua and 24 more before I leave for the beach. I am saying Good-bye in a few days to my students, my cheer girls, my track kids and my co-workers. A few years ago this would have thrown me for a complete loop and my world would have been shaken. Over those years, I have learned an important lesson. While some good-byes are sad, most of them mean an opportunity for change. An opportunity to start over in some aspects. An opportunity to meet new people along the path that you are destined to meet. People that you will impact but most importantly will impact you. I have made a few close friends at my current school that I will treasure forever. Friends that I will see, stay in contact with, love for the rest of my life. No I won't see them on a daily basis but I won't have to see them on a daily basis to stay close to them.

Do I know what I am doing? Nope. I kinda like that. I like the freedom that in 8 days (10 if you count post-planning) that I will be free for a while. Free to dream. Free to search. Free to see what is out there. Free to ask God to move me right where I am suppose to be. There's something so amazing about being at this place and I feel blessed to be there.

So I might be saying a sad good-bye to another piece of my journey but in some ways I feel like my journey is just starting...again.

Mother MAY I?

2011-05-05T09:07:00.000-07:00

Brandon and I have gotten the crazy ideas in our heads that we are only going to use cash for the month of May. We are not going to spend any of our change that we receive from spending the dollars but instead save it till the end of the month. We are going to fill up the cars on Sunday no matter how much gas they have in them with the debit cards. Other than that they are not coming out of our wallets.

*** This is what happens when my husband watches the Oprah network and Susie is talking! ***

Wordless Wednesday

2011-05-04T07:29:00.000-07:00

Another Day

2011-05-03T11:27:00.001-07:00

Part of me feels bad for blogging. There's so much going on in the world right now that my ramblings about life seem so irrelvant in the grand scheme of things. But then again isn't that how life happens. For some life will stop moving for a period of time because of a horrific moment (someone dies, destruction, miscarriage, divorce etc.) But the world keeps moving. Around and around. Life goes on.

So here are the latest ramblings/rants/happenings.

Ramblings
1. I have been back to the gym for the past two weeks and it feels great. Well actually it hurts like hell but it feels great to be able to say that I have not dropped the ball this time. I might have fallen off the bandwagon for a little while but unlike other times I didn't let that failure keep me down. I am hoping to start seeing the changes in my body soon and really hoping to not get hurt this time. I taking extra precaution in that area.

Rants
2 - 6 I know the majority of us feel this way but let me just go ahead and throw it out there. I know sometimes life sucks. You're tired. Too much on your plate. Not appreciated enough....blah, blah, blah. But if you constantly complain about life NO ONE wants to hear it. If you constantly have stupid remarks to make...NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR IT (EXCEPT FOR THE 4 PEOPLE ON THIS EARTH WHO ARE JUST LIKE YOU AND WILL LIKE YOUR STATUS CAUSE THEY ARE IDIOTS TOO!) I know I post a lot of crap to facebook. I tell you about my workouts that no one cares about or about my students which really no one cares about. But really.... You are happy Charlie Sheen is in T-Town because you didn't see Obama (lack of respect with President but that's besides the point) lift any wood while he was there. Or EVERYTHING that is wrong with the country is President Obama's fault until one good thing happens and all of a sudden don't give the man credit. There are certain events that happen (elections especially) that I just think to myself...here come the idiots. I will go on record to say that I did not care for about 95.6% of the things that President Bush did or said. However, I would never wish the man dead; especially when he was in office. Much more to say but really what's the point.

Happenings
7. I am very proud of the way that my church, school and gym have responded to relief efforts for those in Alabama. I will be meeting up with Sara Beth on May 16th to drop off items and help sort through already collected donations.

8. School is almost over and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I will miss my kids and co-workers but I am ready for the new challenge and new place. I will update more on where and what that will be in a few weeks. :)

9. Today is my 3rd anniversary. It is hard to believe it has been three years already but in some regards it's hard to remember life without him. I hope when we are celebrating our 63rd anniversary he is still making me laugh, still keeping me in check and still looking at me the way he did the day that we got married.

Hope everyone is doing well. Peace out.

Things to do this summer...

2011-04-29T06:19:00.000-07:00

Assuming that for some reason I stay in education I plan to make the best use of this summer. So here is an ever growing list of things I plan to do this summer. We'll see how it goes.

1. Read. Lots. I never read anymore unless it has to do with school. So you should start sending me your favorites and I'll review the book here on the blog with a shout out to you for recommending it. Even if it is bad. *** Sara Beth...No I will not read Angels and freaking Demons ***

2. Plant and keep my little garden. I am hoping that this garden both saves me money and causes me to want to eat a little healthier since I will have fresh veggies when I want them.

3. Visit Savannah, Georgia with the honey for our belated anniversary (mom needed power so she came to Georgia and booted us out of our already paid hotel in Chattanooga but we love her anyway and glad she is alive) trip.

4. Lay by the pool, in the pool, on the pool, around the pool, near the pool and every other preposition I can find to say I WILL BE AT A POOL...A LOT. I say this every year but I am damned and determine to make it happen this year!

5. Help out at our church a little more this summer. It will be a good time to help get some stuff organized as we move into a time of growth. Hoping that this will lead to some pretty neat things in the near(er) future.

6. Not buy a single cleaning product without a coupon. Since a lot of the food that we buy doesn't come with coupons, I have decided to get back into the coupon world through cleaning supplies. My goal is to not buy a single cleaning supply without some type of coupon or deal. I am pretty particular about my make up and hair stuff so I am just going to stick with cleaning stuff and see what happens over the summer money wise.

7. Set up our guest bed room. I hesitate to write this because there is nothing that I hate worse in the world than painting. But...this needs to be done and I am just going to have to suck it up and do it.

8. Have the Judson girls up to the river for a late summer reunion. Stay tuned for more information.

9. Go on random trips to the beach. We have a trip planned for the beginning of summer but I really want to take a few spur of the moment, cheap trips to A beach this summer with random girl friends. We'll see if it happens.

10. Get back into Crossfit full time. I am easing back into this and I have to say I am pretty surprised how easy it was to fire this back up.

So there you have it. My top ten things to do this summer. I. AM. PUMPED.

A dream is a wish your heart makes...

2011-04-26T08:57:00.000-07:00

I really feel like I am not living out my dreams or using my talents where they need to be used. I knew in high school that I was suppose to be in ministry. I knew it in college and that's why I went to FBC New Hope to be the children's minister. I felt it strong enough to move to Georgia, leaving everything that I had and knew to start a new journey in ministry. Because the TCAMC never went anywhere I was scared and fell into teaching. It was more of a safety net than anything. I enjoy teaching and at times love certain aspects of it but I am not PASSIONATE about it. I am passionate about seeing people plug into places within a church and find their place of service. I am passionate about coordinating events and can do them with my eyes closed. I am passionate about seeing youth deepen their relationship with Christ and about putting a community of believers together in groups. That's what I am passionate about. I don't want to be a children's or youth pastor necessarily. Just someone behind the scenes making it all happen.

The problem is rarely does this type of job 1. exist 2. provide a reliable or comparable income to teaching 3. offer security down the road. So now I am caught in limbo wondering if I am suppose to continue and pursue another teaching job, hope it's a good situation and learn to love it OR put myself out there and follow my dreams. I don't want to live with regret but I don't want to put Brandon and I in any danger now or later but I miss that girl of 2006 who took a risk and followed God's calling.

I guess this is my moment to throw out my fleece and see what encouragement, confirmation, warnings you guys might give me. Let's hear it.

Dark Night of the Soul

2011-04-22T10:35:00.001-07:00

Reflections on Lent:

It has only been in the last few years that I have ever been challenged to really spend my time going through the season of Lent reflecting upon just what Christ did for me on the cross and what being a Christian is really all about. This season started off like any other Lent with Ash Wednesday. I have to say that Ash Wednesday is my favorite service at our church. This year it was even more phenomenal. The worship was great, we were able to sit with our sister in law and nieces and watch them experience it for the first time and it's always incredible to hear the words, "Go and sin no more" and know that Christ has forgiven us through the cross.

A few weeks after Lent started Brandon left with a team from our church to Nicaragua. As he left there was a little fear in me that always creeps up about his safety. Will the plan land ok? Will there be an earthquake and leave them in disaster? Will there? What if?

But my heart quickly settled with the news that they had landed and I went on about my week expecting it to be lonely and uneventful.

I started feeling bad on Monday and something told me to take a pregnancy test. Since we have never gotten a positive result I didn't feel bad taking the test with Brandon not here. I took the test half hearted fully expecting there to be nothing. When there was a slight something I couldn't believe it. I immediately called Heather Kendrick, because that's who I call for everything, and she confirmed that though faint there was something there. I spent the next hours and days taking test just to confirm that I was actually pregnant.

On Saturday morning after being pregnant for a week with my husband in another country I started bleeding. It was just spotting but something in my heart told me that this would not lead to good. There was a battle that waged about whether or not it was inevitable or something that the Lord could reverse through enough prayer.

Saturday I rested thanks to Heather and her bed and woke up Sunday morning feeling good. I was able to sing that morning at church and remember tearing up at the lyrics that said "prepare our hearts to risk again." Mike's message that morning dealt with going through what he called the dark night of the soul. I knew the minute the man started preaching that we were about to be traveling into those waters yet again and knew that this time would be much more painful than the first. I knew that we were about to hurt but somehow knew that the truth that Mike was preaching would carry us.

Brandon returned home that night and as soon as we walked into the door of our house I started bleeding heavily. The next morning we went to the doctor and though he would not confirm anything we knew by his emotions and body language that we were not going to get good news. This is where the struggle within me started with God. He had once again let me down and robbed me of what my heart desired. I started trying to reason out what was happening. I started doubting his love for me. I started doubting his goodness and faithfulness. I started hating him and being so mad at him for not answering mine and a host of other people's prayers the way that we all saw fit.

Scared at my emotions and where I felt myself going I decided to go and talk to Pastor Mike. It was a long conversation but one question that he asked brought me back to reality and has stuck with me ever since. Mike asked me if we were to get pregnant and keep the baby the very next month would God all of a sudden become faithful to me? He told me that I was mad at a god that I had designed in my own mind and not the real, living God that doesn't keep bad things from happening but simply sustains us through them.

It has been since that question that I have allowed the Lord to start working through me through this whole ordeal. A few lessons have been learned.

1. That God's faithfulness is not defined by his granting my desires. God is faithful because he carried me through that storm. He is faithful because he saved me. He is faithful because he allowed Brandon to be at home through the whole thing. He IS faithful.

2. His portion is enough. Last week as we sang Amazing Grace, I was floored by the line "he will my shield and portion be as long as life endures." Even if he took away everything from me tomorrow, His death on the cross and the life that it gives me would be enough. Whatever in this life that He chooses to give me will be enough. The more that I stop and take stock of the amazing relationships in my life the more that I realize that I have already been blessed way beyond what I deserve because ultimately I deserve none of it.

3. Resting in Him. From the very first signs of bleeding to just the other night of sitting in His presence in a dim lit sanctuary I am finding out what it means to rest in Him. I have always been a controlling person. I want to be in control. I want to be in control of my schedule, of my routine, of who I let in and out of my life, of my surroundings, and especially my emotions. Stopping and resting means that there is a chance that the Lord might actually want me to deal with some of my past. Stopping means that I will have to be alone with my thoughts which scares me sometimes. But God is calling me to stop and rest in Him and over the past few weeks that is what I have done as hard as it is for me.

In the Garden, Jesus prayed for the cup to be taken away from him. I am learning that it is not wrong to pray for the bad to not happen, the inevitable not to come. However, all I need is the strength to get through whatever may happen.

I don't know that I am to the point that I can say that I am thankful for this struggle but I am thankful for what I have learned through it. I am thankful for the people who have prayed, who have not said anything when nothing needed to be said and have spoken truth when it needed to be heard.

This Sunday I will celebrate the resurrection of Christ is a new light. His portion is enough for me. His death on the cross is what gives me life. In Christ alone my hope is found, He is my light my song. The last few weeks have been one big dark night but morning has finally come. Sunday is here!!

Full Moon

2011-04-20T08:31:00.000-07:00

If you don't believe that there is a direct correlation between the full moon and behavior please come to a middle school during one. I am going to do my research and figure out if it is true. I promise you that I can walk into any school in the nation with my eyes close and tell you whether or not it is a full moon. Promise you.

Nothing profound

2011-04-19T06:40:00.000-07:00

I really want something profound to say today but really there is nothing. Life just is right now. We are preparing for the CRCT right now which is making me want to punch myself in the face. I hate the CRCT and everything that goes with it. Yeah I know we have to measure our kids and see what they have learned...blah, blah, blah. But I HATE that I have to teach to a test and that so much rides on this one week of academic performance for a child, their teacher and the school.

Cheerleading tryouts are also this week and without a stake in the team next year I could really just care less. I am trying to be nice and help the coach out for next year. I am kinda glad that I am not coaching next year only because I will never, ever, ever, have a squad of girls that were as great as this group. They were all so well behaved. They were so sweet. They were non-dramatic and they were precious. I heart them.

The same can be said for track which is also ending this week. We have our championship on Saturday. Our boys are undefeated in the regular season and stand a great chance to come away with the championship. This has been an incredible group of students that we have been able to work with this year and their parents have been awesome. Not to knock my classroom but it has been nice to teach students who actually appreciate you.

Once this week is over with I have some phenomenal plans. I plan to start the garden. I plan to read. I plan to plan the summer and start some fundraising for my trip to Nicaragua at the end of May. I plan to clean my house some and get a lot thrown away or gone through. I plan to just get my life somewhat back to normal.

So that's it. Boring as can be but sometimes boring is good.

Umm Negative Chief

2011-04-16T10:59:00.000-07:00

So I say "negative chief" to just about everything these days. My students have even picked up on it and the other day when I asked one of them to pick up something from around his desk he responded with "negative chief."

Well yesterday I was forced to show my butt and give a rude and inconsiderate young couple a big ol' negative chief. I took yesterday off to go get more blood drawn and to get my passport. Well the blood work had to be fasting blood work. So the plan was to go get the passport at 9:00 a.m. and then go do the blood work. The reasoning behind this was because if you get to the passport line at, oh say 9:15 you are already #25 in line and won't be seen until after lunch.

So I show up at 9:00 and end up standing in line for a little over 2 1/2 hours. Well about 1 3/4 hours a young couple walk into the passport office. They are two unfortunate souls that have to wait behind the girl with the sign that says you will not be seen until after lunch. Because they are loud and because I have teacher hearing, I hear the conversation that they really have somewhere that they need to be and don't have another day to come back and get their passports before their wedding in June. So a woman in the back with her son tells the couple, "see my husband in the visor? I'll text him and tell him to let you in front of him. He can just tell the people that you were there this morning and forgot something." This is where my blood starts to boil. Really? You are actually having this conversation, OUT LOUD, and you think it's ok?

So tweedle dee (the boy) preceedes to walk up in front of this man and act like he has known hm forever. I look around to see if anyone else in line is noticing this and NO ONE seems to care. The longer I stand there I stop asking WWJD (what would Jesus do) and start asking WWKD (what would Kay do) instead. Unfortuanely Kay beat Jesus this time and I promptly go and tell the attendant working there. As I walk back to the line people start giving me the head nod and the thumbs up sign. If I could have slowed it down to slow motion and played the Rocky theme song I would have.

By this time tweedle dum (the girl) has joined them because they are next in line and the lady approaches them and ask how they got to the front of the line. The man who let them cut (which I could have equally punched in the face) starts rambling on about how they were there this morning and how he told them he would save them a place in line. Well....there it went...my mouth shot off with a big NEGATIVE CHIEF. I told her the conversation and told him how the line breaking happened.

Well apparently their stupid sob story won off the dumb lady working there and they were let in ahead of everyone else in line. This includes me who has not eaten all morning and it is now 11:45. I am not going to lie that I tried to trip tweedle dum as she walked out of the office but it didn't work.

Oh well. At least I left knowing that I had said my peace, gotten the thumbs up by the crowd and even threw out a little "negative chief."

Panama Canal

2011-04-14T09:48:00.001-07:00

Me to my assistant: Mr. Wheeler actually had a student ask him what country the Panmal Canal is in.

Student: Well

Me: Well what?

Student: What country is it in?

Me: Are you really asking that question?

Student: Isn't it in Georgia.

Me: Really? Georgia?

Student: Yeah we went there for spring break.

Me: See if that is an answer choice on the CRCT.

My homework

2011-04-14T05:13:00.000-07:00

Must suck. These kiddos are over it apparently.

Today's writing topic: If you knew the world would end tomorrow, what would you spend today doing?

Student: Not your homework.

Geez

Probability

2011-04-13T04:42:00.000-07:00

I am teaching probability in my math class right now.

The probability of ___________ increases when _______________ happens.

So...we are having a conversation about the words certain and impossible. Here is how it went.

Me: There are some things that are certain and some things that are impossible. For example it is certain that tomorrow will be Wednesday and impossible that tomorrow will be Friday.

Student #1: But....but..what if aliens came to Earth and took over our land and made it alien world and change tomorrow to Friday.

Student #2: Well then we would all be screwed and not need probability anyway.

Student #1: Yeah and we wouldn't have homework

Me: You would still have homework.

2011-04-06T11:52:00.000-07:00

1There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven—
time to give birth and a time to die;
A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted.
time to kill and a time to heal;
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
time to weep and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn and a time to dance.
time to throw stones and a time to gather stones;
A time to embrace and a time to shun embracing.
time to search and a time to give up as lost;
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
time to tear apart and a time to sew together;
A time to be silent and a time to speak.
time to love and a time to hate;
A time for war and a time for peace.

These verses from Ecclesiastes describe a lot in my life right now. We are leaving our season of mourning. That's not to say that there won't be some hard days ahead. They will come. I know it. But you can't stay in a season of mourning forever. Sure what we went through sucked and there for a while it consumed us. But with each passing day you remember that there is a lot in life worth celebrating.

There is a time to plant - and I am going to with my new garden. Grandaddy always planted the gardens around here but since he is gone we feel obligated and honored to be the ones to do it this year.

A time to heal - and heal is what we intend to do. Bitterness and anger have no place in my heart right now. It's not what I was created for. So heal I will.

A time to laugh and dance - we have wept and we have mourned. We are ready to dance and laugh and enjoy our friends and each other and we have many plans this spring and summer to do so. We look cook outs and hanging out with friends and we plan to do it more than our fair share. Life is too short to not enjoy it with the people that you love.

A time to sew - ummmm...I'll leave that to my talented friends.

So here is to celebrating life because that is what we intend to do.

Sara Beth has nothing better to do

2011-04-05T10:25:00.000-07:00

than read my blog apparently. So here is her update though we talked for an hour yesterday. By the way SB... I win for today for sure with number one. But let's be honest I probably won last week and this week and might even take the month at the rate I am going. If you want to win or at least catch up something extravagant needs to happen....like the pony cart catching on fire in the middle of the road, a trip to Lady of our Souls Mother Angelic Holy of Holies or whatever the crap that place is, etc.

1. My cousin finally got paroled for murder. Yeah I wrote that. Yeah you read that. Yeah I am from New Hope. Ummm yeah. Moving on.

2. I am on spring break and loving it. So looking forward to the summer when all I have to do is to sit on my butt and do nothing. Actually this week I am cleaning and straightening out some stuff in closets but I am not getting up at 5 AM or being a warden to children.

3. I got an invitation to an invitation only job fair on April 16th. Wish me luck!

4. I am planning on heading back to Crossfit next week if the doctor will ever release me.

5. I AM GOING TO NICARAGUA IN MAY!! I am so excited. I couldn't let my husband go and not do it myself. So he is picking up a few extra shifts, I am making a few extra cakes and we are begging the parents once again. YAY! I'll elaborate more on this in a post soon.

6. Did I mention that my cousin got paroled for murder? Yeah I win.

Got to get back to cleaning the house. If I am going to clean it some of my friends should come see me. Just saying.

Blessings

2011-04-04T12:56:00.000-07:00

Amazing song that I heard today and found very fitting for the journey that we are on.

We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home,
It's not our home

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise

~ Laura Story

There will always be a Judson

2011-04-01T08:30:00.000-07:00

This is my second year in a row that I am not attending J Day. At first it was because of my friend Aundrea's shower. Aundrea is probably my closest friend here in Georgia. We lived together for 2 years. Her brother is the one that brought me here in the first place. This was the only weekend that we could do the shower and she is one of the non-negotiable people in my life.

Even if there were no shower, I still don't think that I could go this year. Not now.

See Judson brings out emotions in you that you sometimes forget that you have. I can go for months without becoming emotional about anything, think about "If the old walls" and I am weeping like a baby. Judson was a place that I felt safe for four years. Now granted we were not in the safest town ever. The local gas station was called the Stop n Stab for Pete's sake. But emotionally I felt safe. Even when our world was crushed or our foundation shaken, we were still somehow safe.

Safe with each other. Safe to share fears and doubts. Safe to ask those tough questions that I am asking right now in my life. Safe to cry. Safe to yell. Safe to smoke and talk about God all at the same time.

We were safe with our professors. Safe to explore what we really and truly believed about our faith. Challenged to throw away all that had been ingrained within us and find our faith and call it our own. Safe to walk across the street to their house when you needed to cry or call them when there was an arrest for your warrant (sorry about that one Dr. Tew. I finally paid that ticket!)

We were safe with our president who knew our name the moment that we came onto campus and who cheered us on as we crossed the stage with diploma in hand.

We were safe knowing that there were a multitude of women who had gone before us and a multitude that would come after us and share the same memories and paths.

Today I don't feel that safe. I feel shattered. I feel vulnerable. I feel let down.

But somehow today as I have been singing those songs in my head I feel safe knowing that there will always be a Judson. Though I may not be there today, Judson means as much to me as Judson means to you.

Doing Messy

2011-03-31T08:43:00.000-07:00

Brandon and I are smack dab in the middle of another miscarriage. This time we peed on the stick, saw the yes, got our hopes up, and got our hopes dashed.

Sometimes life can be messy. Emotions can get really messy. Messy is not something that most people want to deal with. People want to deal with cookie cutter emotions. Fine. Ok. Doing well. That's all they really want to hear.

So let me answer the question that everyone is asking but no one really wants to hear the real answer. I am not ok. I am not doing well. In fact, honestly, I feel like I am losing my mind. I am mad at my birth mother for birthing 5 children and not taking care of a single one of them. I am mad at God for not answering our prayer and intervening. I am questioning what praying is really suppose to do because obviously it doesn't change his mind. I am questioning my faith. I am wondering if I can really prepare my heart to risk this again. I am angry. I am pissed. I am hurt but yet somehow numb. I am ready for the physical pain to be over with and I am more than ready for the emotional pain to ease. I am tired of holding back tears afraid that I am not ever going to quit crying and I am afraid of feeling like I am losing control.

People don't want to hear that. Instead, they want to hear that I am trusting God to get me through this. That I am leaning on him for the answers. That I am finding my strength in the one who gives it.

It's not that easy folks. It's hard to be transparent. It's hard to be real. It's hard to tell God that you hate him but it's even harder to tell him that you love him when at that moment you don't.

Maybe I am mad at the God that I have made him out to be in my mind.

I just know that I am not ok. I will be. Eventually. One Day. Hopefully soon. But if you are going to ask the question...be ready to deal with the messy answer.

Publix is my friend

2011-03-16T14:35:00.001-07:00

There are things I love about Publix. I love how clean the stores (usually) are, their produce and most of the time their meats. I love them even more for their GF stickers. Eating Paleo means that you basically eat Gluten Free. For other issues I usually...usually being the key word...try to stay gluten free is I can. So thanks Publix!!

Re-do

2011-03-15T17:58:00.000-07:00

Just so you know...I didn't quit my job on the spot. Just for next year. I will finish out my contract for the end of the year.

So here is a little rant on some of my precious students. I love them but I hate when they state a question not ask it. Example...I can go to the bathroom? I can get a drink of water? I can have a pencil? I don't even fight the battle between may and can anymore. The new battle is....CAN you please ask a question and not tell me what you are going to do but say it in a high pitch voice so that it sounds like you are ASKING me permission to do something you have already STATED that you are going to do.

Yeah...I'm over it.

When Peace Like a River

2011-03-11T08:27:00.000-08:00

There are times in life that you have to stand up for yourself and make a decision based on what is best for you. For about the last 30 years my decisions have been 99.9% based on someone else. What makes them happy. How I can help them. Well..this time I made a decision to do what is best for myself. I quit my job. A job that I love. A job that I get to do with students and co-workers that I adore. But a job that drives me into the ground. I lave my house at 6 every morning to drive an hour away and usually don't return until 7 or 8 at night. I have the toughest job at the school with the most preps (classes to plan for) out of anyone in the entire building. So, the choice became easy quickly. I will be trying to find a job that is close to my house that will allow me the chance to live my life with those that I love a little easier. When I get off work I will be able to be home in a matter of minutes not hours. I will be able to keep my beloved OBGYN should we get pregnant and ultimately WHEN I do get pregnant I won't be an hour away from my child. I will also be off in time to go to the gym and will hopefully have time in the morning to get my crap together instead of laying around for just another minute of sleep because my body is so exhausted. So here is to hoping and praying for the right job close to my house!!

Until next time...

Complete Randomness

2011-02-21T09:46:00.000-08:00

I have not vowed like my good friend SB to blog more this year but since I can't be outdone by her...here is a list of enlightening facts about my current life!

1. I have not worked out in over a month and it is killing me. I hurt my knee back in December and it has kept me on the side line for almost a month now. A year ago it would have been a welcome reprieve from excising. Right now it is just a pain in my butt....or well knee!

2. Not working out = eating like crap. No excuses...I know, I know. But when you can't work out it kinda kills the motivation to eat right.

1 + 2 = 3 I have to get my crap together and just do it again. The tough/easy part comes from knowing that I know I can do it. Time to face my fears and just go do it again.

4. Please do not ask me when I am going to have a child, why I don't have children yet as though because I am 30 my baby making years are nearly up (have you seen the Duggar woman), or tell me to go make a baby like it's really that easy. I understand for some folks looking at the opposite sex works for them and they can pop out a kid, however, it doesn't work like that for me apparently. So...let me and the doctors handle it and when I do in fact get pregnant you will be the first to know...or probably not. I have a list and if you aren't a Mee-Maw or one of 5 other people you can read about it along with the rest of the free world on Facebook.

5. Brandon is doing great as a fire fighter and I am adjusting to my job as a single mom to 2 dogs every 3rd night of my life. The dogs are the only thing that keep me sane at night only because they bark like a bunch of wild things when someone comes near our house.

6. I am starting my Specialist in the summer. I have no kids..see #4 if you want to know when...so why not get another degree. I am doing it with 2 former co-workers and a current co-worker so I am hoping that my lack of discipline, motivation or responsibility will be kept in check by these 3. I have never had to take classes online before so this will be a change for me.

7. Our church is awesome. Really. Awesome. I love our church and love what God is doing through the people that make up Celebration. We have partnered with a town in Nicaragua and Brandon is leaving in March to go on a mission trip for a week to Jinotega, Nicaragua. I love that we will celebrate Lent starting in March with Ash Wednesday service. This service is one of my favorite services that we hold at our church. We close out Lent with Holy week with a Maundy Thursday service (foot washing basically...not my favorite service), Good Friday at the Cross, Sunrise on Easter and baptism during the regular Easter service. We love our small group made up of the Kendricks and Deatons (our marriage mentors.) We are also so excited that our sister (in-law) and 3 nieces are now attending Celebration with us!!

8. Cakes - I have a wedding cake to do in May. I am not going to lie when I say that I am nervous but I am also confident that with a great team of friends helping me it is going to be amazing!! Well that's what I am hoping for anyway.

And that's about it! You have now been caught up with the Peevys and our little world! Until next time.

2010

2010-12-14T07:10:00.000-08:00

I think that this picture pretty much sums up my 2010. When I look back to 2010 I will remember it as a year of amazing change, growth, hurt, disappointment, love and grace.

Here's the annual month to month re-cap.

January - Was determined to start the year off better than 2009 ended. It didn't take much. It was a great month of getting to celebrate so many friends that were expanding their families either through marriage or snugly little babies.

Jan/Feb The mee-maws got together a little later than normal for Christmas and I finally got what I always wanted for Christmas. A HIPPOPOTAMUS!!

February - March was pretty calm and rather uneventful.

April started off first of 16 weddings this year. We were able to celebrate with Abby and Kevin on their BIG day! I also was able to present my capstone for my graduate school and PASSED!

Another HUGE moment happened in April when Brandon started his first of 32 weeks in the Fire Academy. He started with the EMT portion and came home wiped out every day. We spent most of our night studying and writing papers between the two of us. We were such a fun couple! :)

May - We continued the wedding celebration with Stephanie and Ricky. I got to make the groom's soccer cake and it was SO much fun to do.

The BEST and BIGGEST news was my GRADUATION from GRAD school. Praise the Lord it was all finally over.

June - was filled with even MORE weddings as we celebrated Keith and Kaitlyn and Maggie and Brian.

It was during this time that school was letting out for the summer (thank you JESUS) and I knew I had to use the summer to get control of my life. For years I have bounced back and forth with my weight. Lose a little...gain a LOT. My husband had begun Crossfit in December as a way to train for the academy. With him officially in the academy we had the funds for me to be able to start Crossfit. For more of the back story you can read my other blog at www.journeythroughcrossfit.blogspot.com.

To say that it has changed my life is an huge understatement. It was the beginning of the best decision I have ever made...to care enough about myself to save myself.

July - Hey guess what...we went to another wedding. This time they were crazy enough to invite our crew to the Ritz at Lack Oconee. Carrie Underwood's wedding was the weekend before we were there. She was afraid of being upstaged by us. (Just kidding)

The theme of the weekend quickly became "We will never have the chance to be here again.." and many memories were made. The ones we remember or can tell without incriminating ourselves. By the end of the night the Bakers were wed and no one went to jail.

August - School once again started and I continued my journey through crossfit. We started a Paleo Challenge at the gym. Veggies, Meat, nuts and seeds, some fruit, water for 12 weeks.

September - I was able to hit some of my major fitness goals such as finally getting a pull up using the bands. I also began training for my first 5k which was the weekend after my 30th birthday. During September Brandon endured more training with the fire portion of the Fire Academy and was literally wiped out every afternoon when came home.

The challenge was well underway but I was struggling. Ben, the lead trainer at the gym, suggested that I enter into a contract with him for 30 days to show me just how much my body could change if I stuck with the program. Starting September 17th I started the contract and stuck to it religiously for 30 days.

OCTOBER - is always a BIG month for me because well...it's my birthday! We celebrated yet another wedding with Tony and Emily and wished Tyne and Tim well from afar.

Turning 30 was not as bad as I imagined thanks to the fact that I was feeling stronger and healthier than I had ever felt. The week after my birthday I ran my first 5k and finished in 48 minutes. It was amazing to have over 20 something people run the race with me. Betsy even had t-shirts made because t-shirts make everything better.

The night of the 5K we celebrated with friends from every area of our lives. It was our Christy's Birthday 5k/Brandon's graduation from the fire academy party. It was incredible to be reminded of all the amazing people who love and support the two of us.

The challenge finally ended and I came up with 3rd place.

Sadly the day that Brandon graduated from the Fire Academy his granddaddy passed away. Mr. Jerry was a phenomenal man of God who loved his family very much. I never felt like an -in law to him. It was only fitting that we were able to celebrate Brandon, something he loved to do, in the midst of such tragedy.

My husband went through with the graduation that night and it was incredible seeing him become a fire fighter. He worked hard for 32 weeks and saw his dream become a reality. I am so proud of him and his dedication to his new job.

November - We were able to travel to Alabama for my friend Marie's wedding. It was fun to see Marie marry Erik and get to see my Judson friends.

I also went to my first family wedding without Brandon because of his work schedule. This is going to take some getting use to.

has been filled adjusting to Brandon's new schedule and continuing through the journey of becoming healthier. We took family pictures towards the end of Nov and it was fun to see the changes that I have made. I look forward to many more to become. It is a journey. A lifestyle. This time it has to be different.

So...there is our year. As we look to 2011 I pray that it is a year of miracles and many more blessings. I pray that we all laugh more than we cry and that we love more than we can ever imagine.

Father's Day

2010-06-20T13:43:00.000-07:00

Father's Day has always been really hard for me. Growing up it was hard being my daddy's daughter. When I turned 5 my daddy was forced into early retirement through his company. After that he slipped into a deep, dark, depression that held him captive for many years. The only happy memories that I have of him are in picture before my 5th birthday. These pictures and the stories of my family are really the only evidence that I had that my father really loved me. When I turned 19 his depression snapped and went to the opposite extremes. Instead of being depressed, you couldn't shut the man up. Instead of only going to get gas for the lawn mower and a hair cut, he ran the streets of New Hope and surrounding counties from 3 a.m. till dark. We never knew where he was or what he was doing. He put my mother through hell while I was at college. After college I moved back in with my parents and the antics continued. Finally, his health started to really get him down and most of his annoyance came at home. Yelling at us, the cat, and just being weird. We ended up having to put him in a nursing home. Mom went everyday. I went when she laid the guilt trip on thick enough. By this time I was living in Georgia and my trips became less frequent.

October 31st, 2006 I got a phone call that daddy had aspirated soup into his lungs that were already infected with COPD. November 18th, 2006 I got a call to come home and help make decisions regarding his life.

I left that Tuesday morning from Georgia and made the trip back home to New Hope. I had talked to mom earlier and she told me that he was coming in and out. Talking a little bit, eating some but that she could tell something was happening. I walked into the room and went to one side of the bed and hugged my mother. My daddy woke up and called me Crissy. I went to the other side of his bed, held his hands as he told me he loved me. Those were his final words on this earth.

It's taken me 4 years to really process that moment. Those moments leading up to his death. The remaining moments counting breaths and watching something happen inside of that room that only my daddy and Jesus could see happening. In those moments, I hated him, loved him, forgave him, resented him. I stayed in the room night and day until finally I could smell death and myself. I went to take a shower and no more than 5 minutes after I left the room, my daddy left this world. I really don't think he wanted me there to have to see that. To have to see his spirit leave his body. My aunt Gertha who is now also gone was there with my mother that day. When I walked back into the room the sweet Asian nurse was singing Amazing Grace over my daddy.

He loved me. I know that now. Sometimes I mourn his life, other times I mourn what I never had in him. It wasn't his fault and I know that he did everything that he could to give me a great life.

I pray for the daddy that Brandon will be one day. I pray that our children are not robbed of a father physically or mentally. I pray that my children will not have to look at pictures to get the sense that their father loves them but know it at every turn that they make. I pray that through Brandon they will be able to see the Father's love for them.

I treasure the pictures and look forward to the future.

Thank you for being a friend Blanche

2010-06-03T11:05:00.000-07:00

That sucks! Cue up the old episodes of Golden Girls.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KiQzUEc_FmI

School's out for summer!

2010-06-03T06:35:00.000-07:00

Go ahead and sing it in your head because I know you want to. I'm shouting it out loud. This has been a rough year to be an educator. We were furloughed for 7 days this year. That meant no planning days at all and for those of you who think you should be able to plan and do all that we have to do in an hour's planning time...get real. It also meant a reduction in pay which came at a time that Brandon was entering the fire academy and taking HIS reduction in pay. At the end of the day we are both blessed to have jobs and that's really all that matters. A little couponing here and there and just being smarter with our money really helped us out and taught us a lot for the future.

It is also weird to think that I will never have to spend another summer (or fall and spring for that matter) at grad school. Finishing my master's degree was definitely a huge accomplishment and I am so glad that I did it. But I am so glad that I am done. For 3 years I drove 2 hours each night, 3 nights a week to Athens, Georgia. You can imagine the money we are saving not having to pay that gas bill anymore.

So onto summer. I have lots of plans for this house and all the crap shoved into closets for the summer. I also want to finish up some of our remodeling projects by fixing up the office area. But mainly I will enjoy some time to concentrate on all the things that I have let go by the way side while school has been in session. It is time to concentrate on me for a little while. No more school, no more grad school, just me time. Life is good.

So...bring it on summer. I'm ready!

The last days...

2010-05-21T08:54:00.000-07:00

I've always had a fear that we are living in the last days. Now that I am a middle school teacher, I know the REAL fear of LAST DAYS. Not the last days of this earth, though I do find myself praying for Christ return a lot more these days, I'm talking the last few days before summer in a middle school.

These kiddos have lost their freaking minds. Holy Junk! I can only equate the experience of the days to something that I have not yet experienced...childbirth. You have to forget how bad it is before you decide to do it again.

There have been a few precious moments, like the kid who wrote the sweetest message to me in my yearbook. He said his favorite thing about being in my room was the fact that he knew that I cared about him. Isn't that really what it's all about???

But then...there are those quotes...those moments....that will one day make up my book on being a teacher.

"Mrs. Peevy, on your grave it's not gonna say R-I-P...it's gonna say M-E-A-N!"

If you would like to hear the dialect in which this quote was spoken, you may call and get the full story.

Oh well...another year down, a contract signed for next year, a love for students (somehow, still) and a great school to do it all at!

The Kitchen

2010-05-10T13:47:00.001-07:00

This was before....

And this is after....

We painted the kitchen this great green color called Recycled Glass from Sherwin Williams. We painted the brown trim and under the chair rail white. Gone is the shelf full of grandmother's "stuff" and the scary chef man with a dead fish on it!

The monogram windows were great finds at Hobby Lobby! 50% off all home decor stuff! 3.99 a piece. 12.80!

Just a little paint and some clean up!

We are not completely done in the kitchen but we are getting there. The breakfast table (refinishing), the back splash and a few odds and ends are all that is left...but wow just the paint and a few little things made such a difference!!

Renovations

2010-05-04T11:22:00.000-07:00

So kitchen renovation turned into...whole house renovation. This past weekend we painted the living room, dinning room and kitchen. I can't believe how well it all turned out. Now I just have to go do a little treasure hunting to pull it all together.

Before

2010-04-15T15:37:00.000-07:00

Extreme Kitchen and Office Make Over

2010-04-12T10:51:00.000-07:00

So here are the plans. My kitchen and office are in desperate need of make overs. We are so fortunate to be living in Brandon's grandparent's house but we don't want it to look like we live in Brandon's grandparent's house. We started a few months back by changing out my bathroom, his bathroom and our bedroom. So it is time to finally start doing something about it.

(Can you tell grad school is over for now and I need something to occupy me???)

The goal is to do it for as little as possible. I want to really get creative on how I go about doing this and really keeping it to a small budget. Our budget for both rooms is 200.00. We'll see how that goes!! :)

So here is where you come in...I need some advice on how to make this thing happen for CHEAP!

My first major decision is going to be whether or not to paint the cabinets in my kitchen. I really want to paint them white but I really don't know that I want to put forth the time or the effort. If I can make it all come together without doing it I would rather.

I will say that one good thing about being in the cake business is that my paint for both of these projects has been provided for the price of a cake. That's pretty exciting and saves me money on my total bill.

My idea is to use the green in the oven and pick a lighter shade of green. I want to do black and white accents. So...start chiming in and I'll post pictures as I change things up.

Pictures as soon as blogger stops acting up!

New Blog and New Love

2010-03-13T07:50:00.000-08:00

I have a new love. Not that I can afford to many things from her collection, but WOW her stuff is so pretty. She also has a pretty great blog that I love to follow.

http://www.lisaleonardonline.com/

I am thinking about asking for a graduation present!! :)

Yum Yum Sauce

2010-02-14T15:20:00.000-08:00

We have a huge joke in the Peevy household about Yum Yum sauce, or as some call it the seafood sauce from Japanese restaurants. At a really fancy Japanese restaurant in Disney, Brandon (who apparently turned into country bumpkin) asked for that stuff..you know...seafood sauce. They brought him ranch.

So anyway, for Valentine's day we went to Sho-gun. Their yum yum sauce was not so yum yum. In fact it was really bad. For our left overs tonight I decided to try and make it. Turns out it's basically homemade honey mustard with a kick. I found a few recipes but didn't really like any of them. So I just decided to take some of their advice and do my own.

Below are the ingredients. I tried to measure it out but really just ended up playing with it. It turned out AMAZING! I am so excited that I got it right on the first try.

Around 1/2 to 3/4 cup of Mayo...more if you need more
TBS of Vinegar
1/4 teaspoon of Paprika... See More
1/4 teaspoon of Garlic
Teaspoon or so of mustard (less is more...and you can always add more!)
TBS of Honey (probably would have been ok without it)
2 TBS of Sugar

EEEEK!!

2010-02-09T11:08:00.000-08:00

I am so excited for Brandon and his new journey as a firefighter. He got fitted for all his uniform stuff today and will officially start the training academy next month. He will be in the academy for 10 months. During that time he will go through EMT training and the actual fire fighter training part. At the end of the 10 months he will graduate from the academy and be a firefighter. The whole time that he is in the academy he will be paid by Gwinnett County but it will be a significant pay cut for us. Still, this is his dream. So we will sacrafice where we have to and live way below our means to make sure that we are covered during this transition time. It'll be tough but we have already started making preparations for it and it's going really well.

So wish him luck, wish me luck...cause here we go.

Frankie is on his way home

2010-01-22T20:10:00.001-08:00

Dave and Kim are picking up Frankie tonight from an airport in Orlando! Miracles do happen!

Heart Line Ministries

2010-01-20T04:27:00.000-08:00

If you are wanting to donate to Haiti but are leary of some organizations out there, Heart Line Ministries is a great organization. HeartLine is an orphanage in Haiti that is in desperate need of our help. They are not only caring for the kids that were already in their care, they are now caring for other kids that have come their way. They have set up make shift clinics to try and help all of those that are in need. You can learn more about them here

Frankie Update!

2010-01-19T09:29:00.000-08:00

Not only were Kim and Dave able to be on ABC with Diane Sawyer (thanks to Skype!) to plead their case...they got some great news yesterday!!!

HUMANITARIAN PAROLES WERE GRANTED!!!!!!!

Kim and Dave started the year dreaming that Frankie would be home sometime before the end of the year. They will soon have him in their arms and home with their precious family!

Continue to pray for the orphans of Heartline Ministry as they make this transition to live with their adopted families. Pray that their will be peace and sweet dreams for all of these little ones.

YAY!!

Orphans in Haiti

2010-01-18T06:18:00.000-08:00

In the process of moving to Georgia I was lucky enough to be introduced to a ministry called Wayfarer Ministries. One family from this ministry, Dave and Kim Rhodes, were currently in the middle of the adoption process when the earthquake hit. The adoption process in Haiti is long and painful at times. Couples who adopt from Haiti understand that there is usually a waiting period of over two years. Dave and Kim were pretty far along in this process and were finally starting to see some good progress being made.

I am posting this to ask you to read their journey and get involved. Dave and Kim are looking for people that would be willing to contact local US officials that have the power to help get the children of the Heartline ministries home to their adoptive parents.

You can read all about it http://kimrhodes.wordpress.com/

Annie

2010-01-16T11:40:00.000-08:00

I've always loved the movie Annie. (However, it wasn't until I watched it a few weeks ago with my niece that I heard GD in it, not once but twice. Yikes!)

Annie and I are twins. Well maybe not, but here is why I always liked her!

1. She was an orphan.

OK...so I was only an orphan for like 12 hours until my adopted parents drove to Tampa to get me, but give me a break.

2. She sang the song Maybe.

Growing up I had this delusional thought that MAYBE my birth parents were really good people. MAYBE the card would come in the mail like my birth mother promised and MAYBE my birth father was this really great man. Neither true but still I like the song. When I was mad at my adoptive mom I use to go around singing the song at the top of my lungs. She would always scream back...MAYBE they'll come pick you up. DYSFUNCTIONAL I know...but we still love each other.

3. She could sing.

I randomly like to burst out in song. However, my singing is more like country meets rap. Crabb Family meets Nelly!

4. She had a dog.

All I got was a bunch of guppy fish that were ugly as sin. Maybe that's why I have a fish phobia now.

5. Her locket.

Her locket says her birthday is October 18. Ring a bell??? That's my birthday! However, in last night's play they said her birthday was October 28th and I almost got up and stormed out in protest!

6. She was adopted.

Ok so she was adopted by money bags but the point is the same. Blood may get you here, but love is what makes it worthwhile. My mama and daddy may have been limited in what they could give me that was worldly, but the love and security that they gave me was more than enough. I will never be able to repay what they did or me.

That's why my Christmas present of seeing Annie live last night was so special! Thanks husband!

Hope

2010-01-06T14:05:00.000-08:00

Hope isn't optimism. Optimism often denies reality.Hope never does. Optimism is positive thinking; hope is passionate trust.- Rick Warren

So long 2009

2009-12-29T08:22:00.000-08:00

Wow...I can't believe that 2009 is really almost gone.
Here's a recap!

Januaryish - Mee-Maw Christmas = Hippopotamus ornament and another drive pass the railroad tracks, turn left at the post office, and a failed attempt at watching a dvd!

February - Atlanta Valentine's Day. World of Coke, Varsity, DownTown ATL. (This trip ended up having to be salvaged at the last minute but my sweet husband pulled it through and made it a great weekend.)

March - Lost my job

April - Worried about losing my job.
JDAY! It really was one of the best that I can remember.

May - One Year Anniversary trip to Nashville. Grand Ole Opry, Country Music Hall of Fame, BB King's and so much more. We stayed free at the Hilton because of the mishap on Valentine's Day Trip mentioned above.

Moved into Brandon's grandparents' house.

June - Got our new puppy Millie.

July - Got and started new job at Youth Middle School

August - Heather had PIPPA!

September - Millie's accident. She became a 3 legged pup!

October - My birthday...what else do you need??

November and December - Because they have seemed to morph into one this year. A hard two months but very blessed to have been able to spend the Holiday season with such good friends and family.

So...so long 2009. I pray that 2010 is one of health and happiness for us all.

Hope

2009-12-24T10:22:00.001-08:00

Hope

Every year we buy an ornament that symbolizes and sums up our year.

This year it took a little longer than usual to find the perfect 09' ornament to add to our collection. It's difficult to put into words what our year has been like. A roller coaster probably would seem more fitting!

However, when I finally found her I knew she was the one.

HOPE!

Brandon and I have decided that this will be our theme for 2010. Something to keep our hearts and minds focused on why were are here on this earth in the first place.

Merry Christmas and may you find yourself resting in HIS HOPE this season.

"Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark." ~George Iles

Together....

2009-12-17T11:41:00.000-08:00

Over the past few weeks Brandon and I have endured our toughest challenge as husband and wife. We have held each other, fought with each other, laughed at each other and cried together. We have looked at one another wondering if the pain would be less the next day but preparing for the worst. We have grieved the loss of a child that only heaven has seen but one day we will hold. The good thing is...we've done it all together.

I fell in love with Brandon for so many reasons, the first being his smile. It captures you. It engulfs you. You can't help but smile back. It is contagious to say the least.

His smile still melts me but now I love him for something so much bigger. I love the way he loves me. He takes care of me. He protects me. He knows that all I want on this earth is to feel secure and he is seeking to make that his number one priority.

The past few weeks have been hard. I'm sure that there will be things that we will go through that will be harder but knowing that he is by my side makes it so much better.

Love, Love, Love Christmas

2009-11-28T17:44:00.001-08:00

So excited about Christmas this year. I love, love, love the season of Christmas because...

1. We get to celebrate Advent and light the candles in our church and in our home!

2. Love the fact that Jesus was once a baby....so human yet my Savior.

3. Love the decorations and the cozy feeling in our home. We are slowly adding a few new decorations each year and really making our home look pretty during Christmas.

4. Love getting together with so many different groups of friends and family.

5. Love that Christmas means a new ornament for my tree from a Mee Maw.

6. Love the smell of Christmas things...fires, cinnamon, cranberries.

I just LOVE it!

Wahoo

2009-11-21T13:56:00.000-08:00

I am now officially on Thanksgiving break and it feels amazing. So glad that I ....

1. Have time to catch up on grad school work. Just sooooooo ready to be done with it.
2. Have time to clean my house.
3. Am GOING HOME TO ALABAMA. I haven't been there since the summer. This is the LONGEST that I have EVER gone without going home and I can tell it. So ready to be there.
4. Can rest.

Hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving.

Trust

2009-11-07T19:04:00.001-08:00

Tomorrow we continue our Relationship series at church and the word we tackle is TRUST. Trust is a BIG word to only have 5 letters. In fact, it is a word that send shivers up and down me. Putting my trust in something or someone is a really big deal to me. I try to not be a person that is defined by the circumstances. The fact that I was abandoned at 9 months old is merely that...a fact. It is a part of my history but I am not defined by it. My life has been about trying to live above that reality and becoming a better person because of it. However, a pastor of mine said it best when he told me that you are not brought into this world and left abandoned without having trust issues. But I've learned that it is better to live and be hurt, than to not live at all. No one is perfect. Everyone will do something to hurt you eventually whether it is intentional or not. Trust is a choice that I choose to make.

What does trust mean to you? Does it come easy or is it a choice that you have to make on a daily basis?

Presence Voice Touch

2009-10-26T09:42:00.000-07:00

I can remember going to church as a young child with my aunt Lorene. It was a small, white, country church in New Hope. The people in that church loved the Lord and meant well. I can still remember the church offering envelope that I would be given in Sunday School. You would check off if you had prayed everyday, read your bible everyday, how much money you gave, and how many people you had contacted in the week about church. For so long I have struggled through most of my Christian life feeling as though I will never hit the mark. Never be able to check off all of those things on that envelope. I'll never do good enough, never pray enough, never say the right things, etc. I know that this thinking is wrong but it's so hard to break out of this mentality.

Recently after reading THIS BLOG (Annie is a greater writer) I stumbled upon Brad Huebert! Brad is a pastor in Canada that makes sense and puts all of this into perspective. His book Finding Home is a free E - Book that you can download that is in incredible. It's a short read but it is so good. He writes it in the style of a parable about a man (himself) finally finding the true Kingdom of God. It is one of the best things I have read in a long time and just finally makes sense.

He also has a website that is pretty neat. Happy reading!!

Psalm 46

2009-10-25T08:28:00.000-07:00

This morning at church we sang the song...You and I were made to worship. A line stuck out to me that When you and I choose to believe, you and I will see, what we were meant to be. What could/would happen if I truly chose to believe in the power of God, if I chose to believe in myself more, if I chose to believe in the goodness of others?

Psalm 46 was the text for our sermon that was delivered at a needed time in my life. The pastor told us that sometimes you have to be weak enough in order to surrender all that weighs you down. It all made perfect sense!

1. God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble.
2 So we will not fear when the earthquakes come and the mountains crumble to into the sea.
3. Let the oceans roar and foam. Let the mountains tremble as the waters surge.

10 - Be still and know that I am God!

Google Images

2009-10-16T15:05:00.000-07:00

I would love to know what Google Image you can look up and find my blog under but apparently you can (just see the Feedjit!...especially if you are German). Maybe time to jump on the private bandwagon...hmmmm?

Week from hell behind me...

2009-10-03T15:40:00.001-07:00

So by now you might have heard that we have just come through the week from hell around the Peevy household. It actually started two weeks ago when....

1. Our basement flooded during the ATL flood of 09. No serious damage...just annoying. However, we love our friends the Kendricks who helped clean us up and fed us that night so that we didn't have to deal with cooking.

2. On the way to clean out the basement Brandon's grand daddy experienced some heart trouble and was put in the hospital where he is still today. He will be coming home soon. Lots of details that I don't remember but things are looking up at least.

3. Thursday night Brandon starts to feel bad.

4. Friday he comes home from work with a high temperature.

5. Monday...finally goes to the doctor to discover he's had H1N1. Sweet!!

6. Tired of being in the house all weekend, Brandon and Millie decided to take a ride to the walking trail by our house. Millie usually rides really well and just hangs her head out the window. But for some unknown reason she decided to JUMP OUT OF THE CAR!!

7. Breaks her leg. 3,000 to fix it, put her down or amputate. Those were our options.

So we decided to amputate and save Millie. Brandon just couldn't make the decision to put her down and there was no guarantee that she wouldn't need additional surgeries. She is doing great though and we are just glad we have our dog.

So that's it. Fun times in a bag. October has officially started off better than September ended at least.

Hoping that the week from hell is behind us!!

Crock Pot Fun

2009-09-16T15:57:00.000-07:00

So I've been looking for ideas on how to cook every night of the week while going to grad school 3 of them.

Cooking for a whole month?? Not for me. Idea is great, reality it's just not that feasible right now. Number one because I don't have a whole day to cook, another is because I don't get home until 10:00 sometimes and there's just no way to heat up all that frozen stuff at school....

So...that led me to the Crock Pot Blog. (thecrockpotblog.blogspot.com) It's not the same as the 365 crock pot blog (that's a lot of CP meals) but it looks great. The recipes seem easy and look good. Brandon is a very picky eater but I'm hoping that I can throw in a few things here and there and make our dinners a little healthier.

So...I'm going to spend Sunday shopping (with my coupons of course) and trying to figure out my schedule. I'm hoping to post some reviews so that you can try them out too!!

You know what assuming does??

2009-09-13T12:59:00.000-07:00

Just a little rant...

Why does everyone assume that when you get married you are no longer available to be friends? Change is so hard for me sometimes and I just never know how to deal with it. I hate the feeling that I am not really friends with people that I use to be so close to. They are all still friends but somehow I'm the one that drifted away. If I never texted, called or facebooked them I would never hear from them. Maybe it was my fault for assuming they would call me and should have been more proactive about protecting and nurturing those relationships. I just hate feeling the change in the air and hate feeling like I can't even have a conversation with "friends" because we don't know each other anymore. Oh well. I'll value the friendships that I do have and look forward to new ones that the Lord may place in my path. It'll just be hard to look at wedding pictures down the road.

It feels like home to me....

2009-09-07T13:05:00.000-07:00

It's been a whirlwind around the Peevy household since the end of July. School has started and the only word that can describe it is hectic. Youth Middle School has turned out to be a great place for me and I am finally able to see the pieces of God's plan come back together. For a while I was very resentful of having to leave Davis and my friends behind. I am just now starting to see why I am there and why I am not at Davis and I know that it will all continue to work itself out.

School starting means that grad school has officially started as well. I am taking 4 classes this semester in order to try and finish in May. I filled out my application for graduation the other day and it felt amazing. (minus the 75.00 fee) I will finish next semester with one class, my internship (second part) and my final capstone. The hardest part is being gone three nights a week. I don't know how people who travel all the time keep their marriage strong and together. This whole season of being gone takes a toll on us but we are fighting (not literally...ok maybe) through it the best that we know how. Just say a prayer for us if you think of us.

This weekend has been Labor day weekend and we decided to start some our painting projects. We've just put them off for so long that we decided it was time to make this place feel a little bit more like home. I've planned, bought and prepared for a few months for these rooms. We are hoping to have the entire house painted and decorated (somewhat) by next weekend. So glad that it's starting to feel like home.

There are some photos up on facebook but I'm hoping to have some good before and afters up soon.

Hope all is well with you and yours.

So excited...

2009-07-17T15:29:00.000-07:00

I FINALLY HAVE A JOB!!! Even though my summer if officially over and I start back to school next week, I am so happy to finally have a job. I didn't realize the weight that I had on my shoulders until it was finally lifted with the words you have a job.

The ladies I interviewed with were wonderful and the school itself seems to be a pleasant environment. I am really hoping that it's going to be a great place.

The only downfall is the fact that it's a 20 mile drive (which here can take you forever) and I have to be there at 6:45 in the MORNING....gross. But a job is a job and that's all that matters.

So for now it's GO HORNETS!!

Selfish

2009-07-10T14:31:00.000-07:00

I get so selfish sometimes and get involved in my own little pity parties. However this story reminded me this week of how blessed I am and just how good I really have it right now in my life.

A few days ago a former co-worker of mine sent out a prayer request for a family that she knew that lives in our area. I opened the e-mail to find the most heart wrenching story I've ever read. Yet, they are hanging on somehow to the hope that the Lord has a reason behind their ordeal.

You can go hear to read the story of the Morgan family. They are a family of five who have lost both the mother and youngest son out of the family this week to cancer.

It's times like these that you have to hope that there really is a God who really is control and knows what's best...and pray that he holds this family close.

www.superryan.blogspot.com

Catching up....

2009-06-21T13:28:00.000-07:00

I have spent the majority of the afternoon uploading about 400 something pictures from the camera to the computer. I finally got to the box with the USB cord in it!!

So much has happened in our life since the summer started.

At the end of May I left my position as a teacher at Davis Middle School. We are still hoping and praying that the opportunity comes back around for me to work at Davis in the fall. However, I have put in my application with other surrounding counties and hope to hear from some of them soon. This is a picture of most of my class from this year. I taught EBD (Emotional Behavior Disorders). It was a challenging job but I learned just as much as the kids did from the experience.

During the month of May we also celebrated our first anniversary. We spent the weekend in Nashville. We were able to go to the Country Music Hall of Fame and to the Grand Ole Opry!! In some ways it feels like we have been married forever and in other ways it feels like we have been married for only days. He is truly my best friend and I love him more than words could ever express. I hope the next 50 years go by slower than the first!!

At the end of May we were finally able to move in our house. The house sits right behind the Mall of Georgia on a very busy road. We are hoping to only be here for a few years but are grateful for the chance to live in a house with such a rich heritage and great family memories. His grandparents built this house and raised both Brandon's mother and uncle here. The house is kind of quirky with some of it's features and additions. One funny thing is the indoor grill that is in the fire place. Who wants to the smell of charcoal in your house?? Still, it's fun to to have. We have an amazing fire place that I am excited about using in the winter. The only thing I don't love is the scary basement. With our washer and dryer down there it's a great way to get out of having to do the laundry. :)

The first week of June brought about yet another wedding. Since our wedding in May, four of Brandon's friends have taken the walk down the aisle. We started the trend I guess you can say. We headed to Birmingham for the Loudermilk wedding. Brandon's friends are crazy but always a blast!! Jane added our fourth wife into our self proclaimed wives club. We love having her here and can't wait to have Amanda round out our group soon!! That's a hint Baker!!

After we left the wedding on Sunday, we headed up to Huntsville to pick up our newest addition. Millie is a lab/something mix. We say that because there is a big debate about what her mix is. The vet in Huntsville thought border collie. The vet here say Jack Terrier. That's a pretty big difference if you ask me. She has made this house exciting for sure. She is so sweet and loves being here. She has learned her name and even done well with using the potty outside. She has chewed up a few things including a ballpoint pen on our new sofa that we just bought a few weeks ago. However, we love her a lot and think that our family is pretty complete for now.

The last few weeks have been spent trying to pack in as many things as possible. I've started decorating cakes and that's a post all to itself. We are headed to the beach this weekend with family and are set to see the American Idol tour at the end of the summer here in Atlanta.

We are also inviting you all to come to our house for the 4th of July. It's a great place to watch the fireworks from the Mall of Georgia. So if you want to see them and have a free and great view, come on up!!

We hope that your summer is safe and fun and hope to see you soon!!

Meet the newest Peevy

2009-06-09T19:05:00.001-07:00

Her name is Millie. She is a lab that I got from my great grand big from Judson (well of that family line!) We picked her up on Sunday from Huntsville. She was real shaky and nervous in the car. We stopped to let her pee and she just fell over when she got out of the car. She had no clue how to walk on the leash.

Since then she has made her home here and seems to love it. She gets real happy when she sees Brandon in the afternoons and pouts when we put her in the bathroom when we have to go somewhere. We are reading all the websites on how to potty train her. The fact that I am home during the day doesn't hurt either.

She'll be huge when she gets full grown, so I am enjoying her being a puppy right now.

Come see her soon!!

BFF

2009-05-12T13:45:00.000-07:00

Only we can sing all the words to Fancy...even the ones that we made up because we couldn't figure out the real ones and still sing to this day like they are the real words. Only we can randomly tell the random songs on your random CD's by the first few notes and bust it out like we are ghetto. Only we can have 10 word conversations on the phone, most of the time calling each other some kind of name, and end it with love you...bye. Only YOU can be the best friend I've ever had or wanted. I love you and hope that you have a great birthday.

I'll even make you a for real birthday cake instead of one out of cereal.

She didn't have to be....

2009-05-10T15:25:00.000-07:00

There are very few words that can express the love that I have for this woman. She had no reason to take me in and love me like her own. She had no obligation to rescue me from the horrible life that I was living thanks to her step-daughter. She just simply chose to love and care for me in a way that only a mother could. She once gave me an angel that said "without you I wouldn't be a mother,".....but without her I wouldn't be alive. She may have not physically gave birth to me, but she gave me a life that I wouldn't trade for anything.

Restless

2009-05-04T16:02:00.000-07:00

Lately I have been so restless. That's not really a good thing for me. I am a very impatient person and hate not knowing what the next step is. Sometimes in that state of being restless I do stupid stuff. I eat tooooo much, sleep tooooo much (when given the chance), buy tooooooo much or just other random acts of stupidity.

I just really want to be settled for the first time in a long time. I want a job that will be there year after year. I want to be in a house that is "ours" and not something that we are renting or "borrowing" as the next case will be. I want to be done with school and not having it hanging over my dagum head all the time. I want to be at a place where we could start a family when we want, but a trip to the doctor's office the other day confirmed that it might be a while. I'm just so stinking restless.

Ugh...

2009-04-17T16:46:00.001-07:00

Still no word on the job. Looks like the test results from the Math and Science test might mean the difference in a job or no job...very anxious and emotional, tired of waiting and really going crazy because of all of it. I feel like my entire life is on hold and I don't like that.

Bring on the Rain...

2009-03-31T16:22:00.000-07:00

Ok...so I'm not really happy with all the rain, BUT it has washed ALOT of pollen away which is a good thing in my world. So now that I am getting a little bit better it's time to turn my attention on better things...like moving. We are scheduled to move sometime at the end of next month into Brandon's grandparents house. I seriously doubt that it will be that soon but with my spring break being next week, I am planning on doing some packing and cleaning out. I want us to move with very little stuff that we don't need. I also have to find a way to get rid of some "holy" clothes of Brandon's as well.

The job situation is still about the same. Right now we are waiting to see if our numbers will go up. If not, I will sub and finish my master's degree next year. A job would be great but the idea of staying at home sounds pretty good as well.

The couponing is going ok. Some weeks are better than others. This past week was still a good savings week but I had to buy alot of stuff that didn't have coupons. So far my average savings is around 30.00 each time. I've worked it out to where I only go once a month for a BIG trip and then make little trips here and there.

We did really well not going out to eat when we had no money but now we have to learn to live like that when we get paid too!!

I'm ready for this upcoming month and all that it has in store...Spring Break, J-Day, Easter and Dancing with the Teachers just name a few.

Hope everyone is healthy and happy!

What is wrong with me...

2009-03-21T11:39:00.001-07:00

I am sick for what seems like the 100th time in a row. It's another stinking sinus infection. I don't know what I can do to make these things go away. Any suggestions?

Crystal Ball

2009-03-17T15:13:00.000-07:00

I really wish I had a crystal ball right now. I want to know what the plan should be for next year. I just wish I had an answer. But I don't have one, and I guess that's what faith is and how it gets stronger.

Happy St.Patrick's Day!
I'll leave you with this.

An Irish Prayer
May God give you...
For every storm, a rainbow,
For every tear, a smile,
For every care, a promise,
And a blessing in each trial.
For every problem life sends,
A faithful friend to share,
For every sigh, a sweet song,
And an answer for each prayer.

Local Folks

2009-03-11T15:41:00.000-07:00

Savvy Shopper this week has some incredible deals for local places to eat.

Subway has 2 free sub coupons for 6inch subs right now. The cool thing is that right now a 6 inch sub is only 5.00 anyway. So that's 2 subs for 5.00. Can't beat that!

Cabos has buy one entree and get one free. Best Mexican resturant ever!!

Taco Mac has buy one get one free.

*It's our mission to try and not ever pay for two entree's again. Ok..for a while anyway. So if you want to go out to eat with us...we are picking the place!*

Updates and a new fun game!!

2009-03-10T14:34:00.000-07:00

Sit down. Grab a cup of coffee...it's going to be a long one!

For those of you who didn't get my frantic text on Thursday...as of right now my contract for next year will not be renewed. The county that I worked in had trouble producing the number of students that it had projected and as a result I got cut.

So let me answer some questions and fill you in on the latest.

1. How are you? To say that I am not mad is a lie. I have worked my butt off doing jobs that no one is standing in line for at this school. However, some of it is my fault for being stupid in math and science and not having the certification for it. My principal is a very godly man. I trust his judgement. Many people have been through worse, are going through worse, and will go through worse than this news. I continue to believe that the Lord is faithful and have been blessed by his provision this far. I still have my health, my husband and my home! As my precious father in law said...our family still has their health and each other...what more can you need??!!

2. What are you going to do??
Well...that is not so clear right now. Here are the options that we are weighing...
Option #1. There is are a couple of positions that could come available back in Gwinnett county, which is where I was a para-professional at for 2 years. I am not looking high and low in Gwinnett simply because the county is HUGE. There is a room in particular at my old job that I would love to be able to teach. If it's meant to be it will happen.

Option #2. My principal informed me when he told me the news that I would be the first rehired if our numbers at Davis increased. So...if the Gwinnett job does not run out, I will wait, which could be till August to hear from Davis.

Option #3. Sub next year and finish my master's degree.

Option #3 is what led me to my new fun game of COUPONS!!

My friend Jennifer has been doing this game for a while but it wasn't until recently that I found out just how much fun this can really be. While Brandon does not bring home the BIG bucks he does bring home enough to support us. It wasn't until there was no job for next year that we ever really sat down and saw that we really could live off of his salary if we were willing to change how we live. There are some sacrifices that will have to come with this new adventure should we choose for me to start staying at home. No more eating out for breakfast (me usually), lunch (him usually) and dinner (both). No more spending just because we have it. No more buying when we have it at home or not being careful with or wasteful with what we have. At this point we are planning to start living off Brandon's check and saving mine just to see how well we can really do this. We are going to turn off the cable, lose the gym memberships (Look at a recent picture of us and ask if we have been going...) and find the other ways our money is being blown.

The new addictive form of this lifestyle though has come in the form of coupons. I use to think that you clipped a few out of the Sunday times and took them with you when you thought about it. I had no idea until recently that there are people out there that live and breathe this until recently when Jennifer started posting the coupon sites on her blog. Right now I am just a beginner, but just in case you are just starting out let me tell you what I have done.

First...(stole this from Jennifer) I went and purchased a dollar photo album. I took some post it notes and started labeling categories of things I would need a coupon for. I started thinking of the layout of my favorite store (Publix) and just started jotting down the categories. Then as I clipped my first Sunday newspaper worth of coupons I added categories that I had forgotten. I take them with me to the store and when I see one that I will use I take it out and put it in my wallet next to my debit card.

Second...Jennifer has hooked us up with some great websites that teach you the trick of the trades. There are some INCREDIBLE things that you can get for FREE at places like Walgreens and CVS. It's all about taking some time to get familiar with what they are saying on the blogs and then just going out to do it. Learn the words Buy One Get One Free and love them!!

Here are the ones that she suggest...

http://www.beingfrugalisfabulous.com/
http://www.couponsavingfamily.com/
http://fiddledeedeeblog.blogspot.com/
and www.coupons.com

Third...I heard Kate from Jon and Kate plus 8 say..."if we don't have a coupon we don't by it." That's our new mentality in Peevy land. Now of course there are some things that won't...but for the most part we stick to that...or the theory that if it's not on sale we don't buy it.

Fourth...If we don't have a coupon we don't eat there. What once was junk mail is now a hidden treasure. Instead of throwing away all those sales papers I dig to find fun surprises. A LOT of local restaurants have buy one get one free! We have some fun new places to go this month...not the same ol' same ol!

SO...how did I do...

Well for my first real coupon experience I went to Publix...

Over 7.00 in Vendor Coupons
Over 4.00 in Store Coupons
Over 30 something dollars in Buy One Get One Free

For a total of 44.00 in savings.

Plus I shopped smart and got three weeks of lunch and breakfast combos and 2 weeks of dinners for the both of us. I hope to be able to share with you my savings each week as a way to get you pumped about this and to keep me accountable to the process. I will also post the fun restaurants that I find for all those local people looking to be frugal about where they eat out at!

So that's the update. Thank you for your words of encouragement and prayers for Brandon and myself. We are going to be just fine!!

Time for a Change

2009-02-27T15:24:00.001-08:00

Did a little spring cleaning on the blog! Hope you like it!

Bound to start some trouble...

2009-01-18T19:49:00.001-08:00

2 post in one day is unusual for me but I have a rant to make. After reading some blogs today, being in church and just thinking about things I have reached a conclusion...I am sick of people talking about "Christian" things. Since I was 14 I have gone to church in some capacity but seen very few people put into action the things that they say. Now when it comes to being one of those people...I'm probably the freaking poster child and spokeswoman of living one way and doing the other. I'm a hypocrite more than I am not and will admit that I have done more harm in my 28 years than good. But it just bothers me to no end to hear career Christians talk about talking about being a Christian.

I have no need to sit at Starbucks and listen to people talking about "doing life with each other." I would rather be with my hellions in my classroom and see them get the fact that somebody cares about them. They are my community. I am with them day in and day out, watching them make mistakes and achieve unthinkable things.
I don't have to sit around and talk about the new slang Christian terms like "community." To me I would rather have friends that go about the business of helping you when you are hurting, give you a dose of reality when you need it and tell you to get over yourself when you need to lose the pity party. I have about 10 friends in my life that if I needed them I could count on them. Really count on them to help me. To listen to me and to guide me. I don't want to sit around and have conversations about things that I will never be able to achieve like having a quiet time every day or saving the world. I just want someone to help me when I need it and be a help when I can.

I'm tired of watching churches trying to be bigger and better than the rest. I'm tired of people trying to one up each other on the checklist of being a good Christian. Maybe I am just bitter but this is where I am right now.

This probably doesn't make sense to anyone but me.

Me and the Boyz

2009-01-18T12:26:00.000-08:00

So it's time I guess for a little update. It's been an insane last few weeks. Christmas was spent redeeming my title of "driving ho" by going to the houses of our dear family all over the freakin place. From Alabama to Georgia we went around spreading Christmas cheer. Ok...so we made it to each spot by the skin of our teeth, plastering our fake smile on while we probably fought in the car. Ok...so it wasn't that bad either. I did start the tradition of making Christmas cookies with the nieces and cousins in the family and hope to get those pictures up soon.

Christmas closed again this year with Mee-Maw Christmas and it was incredible. We were once again failures at watching a DVD, had an insane amount of chicken and creations from the Jones house, stayed up way to late, and yelled way to loud at the announcements of babies to come. I still go around my house saying...Heather is having a baby!!! :)

Since then it's just been back to work. Me and the Boyz as I like to call it. Around November I was switched to our EBD class room. EBD stands for Emotional Behavior Disorders. Yeah...right person to teach the class right. Right now I have 7 boys in the class. They range in age from 12-14. All of them have rough home lives or emotional circumstances. We apparently lose our minds after Christmas break because we are just now starting to remember how to act semi-appropriately again. Semi being the theme.

I love my boys though. I guess you can almost say I've found my calling (almost because I promise you if a wealthy benefactor came to town I would say adios to the boys and hello to the beach.) I love seeing them make the right choices. A good day is when we realize that someone cares for them and out of respect we do the right thing. There are some hard days with these guys (my chiropracter should be able to build a new wing thanks to me), but those bad days make the good days AMAZING.

I hope all of you are doing well and hope that 2009 is a year filled with precious moments and memories!

My first trip to DISNEY!!!

2008-12-16T14:23:00.000-08:00

Magical Kingdom...the greatest place on Earth!

Here is just a short first installment of our trip to Disney. We went with our good friends Lee and Christie. We got there on Friday night and started our Saturday off at Magical Kingdom. For a girl who has never been to Disney it was the greatest experience. The husbands didn't love it so much but they endured our love for the characters and we went to Epcot next. It was amazing. We went around the world they have built there and rode some amazing rides. Everything at Disney is such an experience. We started out Sunday at Animal Kingdom. We went on a Safari and had so much fun seeing all the amazing animals right before us. The best roller coaster at Disney is Mt. Everest at Animal Kingdom. It was hands down all of our favorites. We went back to end our evening at Epcot at the most amazing Japanese resturant. On Monday we spent the day at MGM Studios. We finally got wise and split from the boys and got to see shows like the Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast. When we finally rejoined them we rode the Tower of Terror and I seriously thought I would wet myself by the time we got off the ride. So....we rode it twice. We finished out our Disney journey with the light show FANTASMIC!! It was such an incredible show and was filled with ALL of the Disney characters. I got a little teary eyed.

It was so much fun. I'm so glad that I got to do it before we have children but can't wait to go back and see the smiles on the faces of our kids as we introduce them to this "Whole New World!"

Thankful Thanksgiving...

2008-11-28T13:06:00.001-08:00

I've been thinking on these things for a while now but decided to finally put together a list.

A random list of things that I am thankful for....

1. Brandon - I never knew that I could love or be loved this much.
2. Being married - It is just a great feeling to know that for as long as I have on this earth...I have it to spend with him.
3. Our little house - It may be little and I may want to scream when I try to cook in our tiny kitchen, but it really is becoming a home.
4. Making new memories and traditions as a family - It seems like this year everything is new. Putting up our first Christmas tree together (without my mother wanting to put nasty silver garland all over the thing) was a HUGE deal last night. It was just so much fun to get to do some of these things together for ourselves for the first time.
5. Lee and Christie - Lee is Brandon's cousin and best friend and Christie is his new wife. They are so important to us. Not only are they family but they really have become our best friends. We love to just cook and have them over, go to different places and shows with them and soon we are all headed to the greatest place on Earth...DISNEY!!
6. Friends - I love my friends. I love my friends from home that I can go forever without talking to but pick right back up when I do get the chance to hear from them. I love my friends from Judson that I have so many memories with and can feel like I am home when I pull back through the gates. I love the mee-maws and what we mean to each other. I love that we might not all talk all the time but there is a bond between us all that keep us living for the moments when we do all get to be together. I love my Georgia friends from churches and schools that I have been blessed to be a part of. And I love my newbies. The newest group of friends that I get to hang out with at school and staff develop with on a weekly basis.
7. New Hope - I love pulling back into town after being gone for a while. Although I don't think we will ever live there again, I do miss it. I love the small town atmosphere and the scenery that makes it such a beautiful place to go back to.
8.Facebook - There I said it. It's crazy but I love to be able to talk to people that I love, see people that I miss, and stalk people that I am interested in their life but have no real reason to want to communicate with them.
9. Alabama Football - I just love it.
10. Sara Beth - I know we don't get to talk as much as we use to but I love it when we do. I love that our conversations can be as simple as a 10 second call to remind each other that we still know the words to Fancy or an hour conversation trying to figure out the world's problems because we don't want to face our own. And sometimes even the conversations when we do face our own because we don't judge each other, we love each other, and we always tell each other that we do when we hang up.
11. Aunt Jettie and Uncle Harold - That they love Brandon as much as they do me.
12. Terry Carter - That he hasn't blocked my text or e-mails of prayer request daily from my crazy life and that he counts it a privilege to get to be a part of the insanity.
13. Ornaments - Mee Maw ornaments to be exact. Each one holds a memory of a Christmas of laughter and food. My tree will never be bare.

There's much more that I could list but these are the things that my heart is thankful for right now.

Yay for Baby Jack and a Prayer for Baby Kaia

2008-11-13T17:50:00.000-08:00

Yay for Baby Jack Bird. Rita you will be the most amazing mom to that little boy. Congratuations.

Please pray for my friend Heather and her baby Kaia. Heather was forced to go into labor at only 26 (or so) weeks. Baby Kaia was born weighing 14oz. She is alive though and breathing on her little own. Please preay for Heather and the baby. Heather has had some issues related to everything but both her and the baby seem to be doing better now.

We're still here....

2008-11-09T10:14:00.000-08:00

I feel like we have fallen off the face of the earth most days. School takes everything I have out of me most days. Teaching special ed is so hard sometimes. Along with the paper work, I have to make sure that each lesson has something going at all times. I can't give these little 6th graders with probation officers any down time. They have to be kept going. We start World War 1 next week and I'm anxious to see how that is going to go with them. I can hear it now...."Mrs.Peevy, so what you are telling me is....a bunch of people got pissed off and started shooting. We do that in my hood too you know." Or something like that. Of course with mine it might be a more red neck version like...." It's kinda like the time my cousin came in from huntin and got pissed off at my other cousin and they started throwing stuff and shootin." I'll probably understand those kids better!

Married life is wonderdful but cleaning house sucks. I can't imagine what my life will be like if Brandon and I ever do decide to have children. We can't do laundry for ourselves. I know if I would just get in the habit of doing it daily it would be better....instead MT. Laundry is in my living room right now and looking at it just makes me want to take a nap.

Ok...so the only really interesting thing we have going on right now is our new doctor. Brandon suffers from the gout and until now every doctor has just wanted to put him on medicine that will one day shut down his kidneys and tell him not to eat beef. So a few weeks back I decided to contact a doctor that my friend had been going to that takes a more holistic approach on things. So far Brandon has enjoyed meeting him and I'm going to start his new metabolic program for weight loss and healthy living. We'll see how it goes. I go on the 18th for a series of fasting blood work and metabloic testing. Sometimes it takes extreme messures to do what is best for yourself. I don't want to get pregnant at the weight that I am at, so that gives me a great incentive to want to trim down and be healthy before I even think about sharing that space and growing a baby Peevy.

So the journey starts next week and I'm going to try and do my best to blog about it. Maybe seeing the results on screen and hearing encouragment from you all will make it a little bit easier.

I'm really looking forward to seeing pictures of baby Jack soon and ready for Christmas this year. This will be the first year that I will be able to decorate my own house and I am so looking forward to that.

Hope all is well with you.
Peace.

People let me tell you bout my best friend

2008-09-28T15:17:00.000-07:00

A few updates and one really corny, cheesy ramble...

1. Mom and her man are back together. I'm over it and over her. If it makes her happy, fine...be happy. Just come to Georgia for Christmas and Thanksgiving if you want to see me.

2. Grad school is kicking my rear end. I only have one week left of the class from Hell. That week has an 8 page paper and a huge final though. I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel right now.

3. I still LOVE my new job, I really do...but this week has thrown me for a loop. We lost a teacher this week due to numbers. She was displaced in our county. So as of tomorrow I no longer co-teach 3 classes and have one by myself. I now teach 3 by myself and co-teach one. I have 2 6th grade social studies classes, one 8th grade Language Arts and my co-taught 7th grade LA. Co-teaching is not what you think either. I actually co-teach. The other teacher and I feed off of each other and take turns throughout the lesson teaching different aspects. I'm excited but hate, hate, hate losing my kids that I have learned to adore. I also hate changing my caseload after spending endless nights working on things to help them in class. Oh well...at least I have a job at the same school.

Now the ramble....

Brandon has been gone since Wednesday. He went on a hiking trip to the North Georgia Mountains and is getting back today. I've always heard of people calling their spouse their best friend but thought that it was going a little far. After being away from him for four days and having very little communication with him (2 - 3 minutes a day) I'm starting to realize that he really is becoming my best friend. I never realized how much I depend on him, crave his attention, long to hear his voice, need him to bring me back to earth, need him to comfort me, want him to say everything is going to be ok...just so I can get mad at him and tell him he has no idea what he's talking about. I have missed his companionship and his laugh and can't wait for him to be home in just a few minutes. We've been away a few times since we've been married, a lot this summer, but this was the first time that we've had no communication. I pray that I keep strong friendships with those that I grew up with, went to college with, and gained here in Georgia...but he really is my best friend.

I told you I was right...

2008-09-16T18:22:00.000-07:00

I hate to say this, especially with my mother's happiness on the line, but I was right. I knew I was. I knew there was something going on with that man that creeped me out. I knew it.

Here's the rest of the story...

My mother dated a guy when she was a teenager. She has just finished taking care of her mother who passed away when my mother was 19. She loved this man. He was called away to war and came back in a wheelchair. He told her that he didn't love her and wanted nothing to do with her. I'm sure it was because he didn't want her to have to live that way but still he broke her heart. Mom met dad, married him, and took care of him for the last 10 years while he was in and out of the hospitial and nursing home. Dad passed away 2 years ago this November. The day he died there were flowers on our front porch from that man. A few months later they started dating and were engaged just a few weeks ago. The whole time I did a very poor job of keeping an open mind about him but crap...the man broke my mother's heart. She called to tell me they were engaged and I lost it. I never did like the situation and was even more pissed that our house would be sold and I would have to go to "his" house when I went home to New Hope.

She loved him. I'll give her that. She loved him, he made her happy, so as much as I could, I put on a happy face and pretended to finally be ok with the situation.

Until last night....Mom called me around 5 my time. I was in class and didn't answer and figured no one had died when she didn't leave a message. I called her when I got out of class and she had already gone to bed. My mother is 61 years old and works 11 hour days so her being in bed early is nothing new. I asked her though why she had called me so early. She responded that usually she was somewhere else but she hadn't gone over there last night because he had told her on the phone that they needed some time a part. Who says that? 14 year olds...that's who. The more I thought about it the more pissed I was. So being me and being like Kay I called him. I said some really not nice things. Especially when he led on like it was her fault. Are you kidding me? The woman works 11 hours a day, goes to his house, takes care of his crippled rear end and then comes home and goes to bed. Really...she has time or energy to cheat on you....come on. So after setting him straight and deciding not to drive to New Hope to kick his face in, I calmed down.

I say all of that to say this....you don't mess with my husband, you don't mess with my mama and you don't mess with the mee-maws. I will punch your face!

So....if I call you and tell you the bus is swinging by to pick you up to go kick some rear end...just put on some pink shorts and be ready!!

It's Labor Day

2008-09-01T07:26:00.000-07:00

and though I'm sad I'm not sitting on a whale with these girls...I'm ok that I'm not in New Orleans!

I am at home however, coughing up a lung, sore throat, and reading a book that I would rather use as fire wood in the winter.

Here's to fun memories!

If everyone else was jumping off a bridge...

2008-08-29T15:15:00.000-07:00

I would probably strap it on and jump too! So I finally got around to changing this thing and updating it a bit. Maybe just maybe that will keep me motivated to post on it. I cliked on my very first entry and looked through all the months just the other day. It has become a scrapbook of events, feelings, emotions, highs and lows.

I got my first real paycheck today. A paycheck that might just cover all the bills, food, and leave me with 25.00 at the end of the month. I've been paid now for 2 years once a month and I'm still not use to it!

We are spending a weekend at home this Labor Day. Hopefully I'll be productive and lazy all at the same time.

Have a great weekend.